Elio’s Glorp Zone, est. 2011

*adds something to my cart* I'm about to make an amazing digital purchase

artists fuck better because we turn sex into art, masterpieces, mattresses become canvases where we can paint our love to someone with bodies.

its like, impossible to come up with anything funnier than the experience of seeing this post

pharoahs fuck better because they ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh put the pussy in a scarmophogoghs

Have you guys seen Jimothy that is one fucked up little guy right there

are you gonna pick those penne noodles out of the boiling water one by one like a man, or are you gonna use a strainer like some kind of democrat?

i’m going to be really honest with you guys i think the tendency to read the absolute worst possible intentions into every action you don’t agree with is getting too automatic and it’s eating you from the inside out

i dont even know where the bit ends and i begin

The earthy smell of rain is one of the most divine scents I’ve ever beheld.

Sleeping poorly is so embarrassing... sorry im grumpy I stayed up past my bedtime. Like a toddler