you get the page; i get the rest

Red flag.

they wont make adjustments to our home so i can be more comfortable

BIG red flag. This is not a "I was raised as a guy" thing; it's a "I will decide what is good enough for you" thing. Sometimes that goes with being raised as a guy, but by the late teen years, this is something that people can get over. It does not require multiple complex discussions and soul-searching to decide you want your partner to be comfortable in their home.

"I didn't notice this bothered you" might be a raised-as-a-guy thing; "no, I'm not going to make that change" is not a matter of unconscious learned behavior, but flat-out denial of your status as a partner.

they told me they need help understanding whats a normal way to treat a partner and whats outwardly just plain mean

Bullshit.

I guarantee they know what "mean" is when it's directed at them.

There is no "normal way to treat a partner" but there is absolutely "how to treat your partner like they have an equal stake in your living situation."

Splitting the household cleaning 50/50 isn't a guarantee of that, but it's a good starting point for people who don't have practice with it. Do not accept any variation of "one of us does dishes/laundry/vacuuming; the other one does repairs/lawn care/furniture building."

Split the daily and multiple-times-a-week chores 50/50. Split them even if your job situations are horribly unequal; plenty of people in worse situations have managed to do all the chores plus childcare. This is not a "what's fair" arrangement but a "let's set the groundwork for fair in the future" - try a full split of chores for a year, and then renegotiate.

If you can't manage an equitable chore-sharing for a year - if it turns into petty fights about "you only washed HALF the laundry" or "you made sure we had big fancy meals on days it was MY turn to do the dishes" or stuff like that... then you may not be compatible long-term.

2026 - 2025 - 2024 - 2023

in spite of it all, happy 2026 pride.

you can download current and past hi-res versions of these over at my ko-fi (ok to print for personal use): https://ko-fi.com/mxmorgan/shop/freedownloads

you can also snag shirts here which go to various orgs: https://mxmorgan.threadless.com/collections/pride

these get reposted a whole lot from here to reddit to twitter to tiktok and on and on, and i don't personally care whether or not i'm credited. i made these for everyone to use, enjoy, and find meaning in them. i appreciate folks who do credit me, but if able, please at least link to the threadless shop in the previous post - folks can get an official shirt where 90% of earnings go to trans led orgs focused on mental health (which is an important matter in general, but very personal to me) and not from a scam bot site selling AI-churned maga garbage where you probably won't get one anyway. i also suggest downloading the files from my ko-fi - they are free/PWYW and you can use them to make your own shirt, patch, embroidery project, whatever. tips are always nice, cuz i do like a pizza now and then, but never required for download.

happy pride! remember that being a transgender is everything but fiction. there are so many real historical figures from every century about whose transgenderism we aren't even aware of