i don't do bad sauce passes

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taylor price
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Cosimo Galluzzi

oozey mess
trying on a metaphor

JVL
Sweet Seals For You, Always
🪼
NASA
h
Misplaced Lens Cap
RMH
cherry valley forever

Product Placement
Stranger Things
Not today Justin
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

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@redsparrow12

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I spent most of my life deeply familiar with fear so intense that it kind of defies description, and so chronic and unrelenting that it compresses a lot of my memories of my first 20 years into a suffocating cave system.
I'm 26 now. I've wandered the wildernesses of myself for a million miles. Observing others' behaviors, I realize that most people have numerous lowercase-f fears that control their behavior a lot, and even though I feel those things too, I can turn them off. I used to be somewhat socially anxious but now I can just. Decide to be unaffected by what others perceive about me. Therefore I have minimal trouble giving speeches in front of crowds, doing weird and unexplainable things in public, or looking strange in a way that draws attention.
It comes in handy. For example if in a group if there is a problem and no one wants to "make a scene" by speaking up to the person in charge, I will do it because I am not affected.
I went for a walk around the town in the middle of the night the other day and that is something others would not do because of fear.
I am not saying that the fear is irrational, there are risks to going on a walk alone in the middle of the night, but I am saying that I can pull up a dialog box that is like "This activity may have risks" and I can just click the check-box that says Accept Risks and then I do not feel any fear after that.
I did not feel any fear at all when I was being shot at, nor when there was an active shooter threat very close to where I was. I'm not sure what that means.
I think it's just that in both cases I had complete clarity on what I needed to do (in the first case, run and get out of there as fast as possible; in the second case, stay put where I was) so there was no necessity for fear.
petition to change LGBT to DFTQ (Dykes Faggots Trannies and Queers, naturally)
AMENDED
happy pride everyone
I don't read as much fic as I used to but one "tell" for non Canadians writing us, besides the etransfer, is the units you use to describe us measuring something. I hate to tell you this but The Chart is real and it's completely subconscious. Please abide
ETA the chart (or at least a version of it):
ETA2: we do use inches/miles in poetic ways ("he was lost in thought/miles away" or "his lips were a bare inch away").
Also, the length of a dick is in inches for SURE.
Stronger Together!!

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This categorisation involves personification for your verification, as they’ve brought in an ordinary household object with the most personality.
date a girl who appeared when your male friend inexplicably disappeared, she seems to know a little too much about you but she’s really cute, so it’s okay
absolutely looosssinggg it. i'm so obsessed with movies which portray the woman MC in a highly specific job because the writers clearly think it's like "off-beat" and "quirky" but have no idea how the field works whatsoever.
i decided to try a romcom i somehow missed i the 2000s 'head over heels' and i got 3 and a half minutes in and we're introduced to the lonely MC with bad taste in men as evidenced by her extremely short list of ex boyfriends, including her first boyfriend when she was 11 or something because i guess that's still relevant in her adult life.
so she's resigned herself to never finding love and prefers to ignore men to focus all her energy into her career.
this job is immediately presented as though it's for spinsters with no hope of ever finding a man.
the mc's lesbian bestie (whose first line involves her being scolded for being too sexual in the workplace, but moving on) points out their colleagues as evidence that they're doomed to a romance-less, sexless life if they don't switch up their shared career path. the colleagues are three old women, so-dubbed "the menopause triplets":
these women are presented as if they have no idea what's going on at any given moment. this is 2001, and presumably this is an entry level job requiring low effort and no experience.
then their boss bursts into the room, unceremoniously bumping a large painting into the door jam and walls, announcing that it's a new project for our MC.
our MC is thrilled to see the painting. apparently it's a light in the daily slog at her dreary job for loser women with nothing going on in their lives.
And that job is? Conservator of paintings (specializing in Renaissance) at the New York City Metropolitan Museum of Art.
The painting being handled like an old couch on its way to the curb?
The Bacchanal of the Andrians by Titian.
Her lesbian colleague who is presumably also a a highly trained & skilled curator finds it depressing that the MC is so excited about the painting.
it's a quirk unique to this MC that she cares so much about paintings, in her department at the metropolitan museum of art, where her colleagues find all that art business rather dreary. because we all know that's what conservators in extremely competitive museum positions are like.
I'm not saying there can't be lifelong love in here somewhere but I also just feel like the monogamous heterosexual marriage you're fantasizing about isn't necessarily best represented by the bacchanal. and that's okay. but i do stand by that.
patterns left by woodworms on driftwood

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I like that she looks anxious and on edge
she looks like she'd say "jeepers!"
hey spit that out! drop it! hey!
Squidward's whole deal is that he was a scion of Old Money who got really into Marxism in college and decided he couldn't live with himself as a beneficiary of the Bourgeoisie. He cut ties with his parents and went to live as a proletariat for a few years to better his music.
Of course, what was supposed to be a short term service industry job before he lived for his art has bloomed into just being his life, and life as a poor artist is never as romantic as one imagines. While the cost of living of Bikini Bottom is low enough that even a frycook can be a homeowner, it's not quite so low that he can afford the luxuries he was used to growing up.
His view of the Working Class as the downtrodden masses were rather tattered by years of living between SpongeBob and Patrick, who were not so much temporarily oppressed intellectuals as they were, well, SpongeBob and Patrick.
Still, through thick and thin he's never gone back on his decision to leave the money behind. The great irony is that he is ignorant of his greatest achievement—his superiority to Squilliam isn't turning a bunch of randos into a functioning Marching Band or turning a burger joint into a fine dining establishment, it's having the strength of character to look at all the advantages Squilliam had and choose to leave it behind.
He will never be a master Clarinet player, but he will always have that
Make my day
Archeops is my favourite Pokémon of all time and this artwork makes it look so badass and amazing! :0
Sorry for the flashbang random person online but I want to point out that it's remarkable how no matter which one of these creatures I draw, it's always someone's favourite, or at the very least they have happy childhood memories about it
I would be so happy to have loved one participate in a wedding in a way that keeps themself safe.

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@/oleggie on tt!
A swimming crab. From Blue Planet - Open Ocean (2001).