used to dream of outer space

due to inflation you must answer my riddles five

due to budget cuts i will grant you two wishes

due to recent layoffs there is only one of me and I lie 50% of the time

hi, ummm. this is awkward. haha. yeah um do you think you could push your boulder up somewhere else? like a different hill? because this one’s kind of already taken. yeah it’s the one i’ve decided to die on, so.

yeah thanks. um and if you see that woman who sometimes comes running up here could you tell her that i’m- yeah the one who makes all those deals with god. yeah. could you tell her this is the hill i’m dying on and she needs to find a different one? fuck hang on i can see those two kids with that pail of water again give me a second-

The logic is sound

No, kids should not have unsupervised acess to the internet.   Yes, I got that and it was the best thing that ever happened to me.    Its a paradox.

YALL REALLY DO BRING THIS BACK EVERY SEPTEMBER

I just noticed that September is spelled wrong

it’s the 17th of august

Aliens for April…… why not

Bro please be nice aliens, like, please

WOAHHH that’s so cool!!!

Reblogging again for the “April Aliens” part

Why not?

catching that mission on camera by accident is just as cool as aliens.

“I was looking at the moon and I accidentally captured footage of a once in a lifetime lunar mission that’s mapping the surface of the moon a quarter of a million miles away…” Now THAT’S COOL!

“Don’t bring a gun to a knife fight. Don’t bring a knife to a knife fight, either. Stop going to knife fights altogether. What’s your deal with knife fights?” – Welcome to Night Vale episode 64, “WE MUST GIVE PRAISE”

what is it about the mandalorian that's so attractive, like u only see his face like 3 times and he's so hot somehow without his face showing. someone explain.

can I now add to this to say... it got worse with the soft Daddy mando in Book of Boba Fett

no offence but is this seriously what we're doing for the rest of our lives. like. just work minimum wage and drink soy lattes? be a 4.75/10? I half-heartedly thrift for my clothes and watch the world collapse around me in a very boring and predictable way? sure I can go hike the fucking pacific crest trail and I romanticise my bus ride and listen to hozier or whatever the tiktok girlies say these days. but this can't be it.

For others it's so much worse babe.

You can drown in 6 inches of water or 6 feet. It doesn't matter how deep the water is, it only matters that you're drowning.

Went to the farmer’s market yesterday. Hadn’t gone out in over a year. Guy selling mushrooms asked how I was doing. I panicked and did an awkward little shimmy dance at him. He wordlessly did it back. Can’t stop thinking about this interaction

[OPENS FRIDGE, REMOVES TUPPERWARE CONTAINER LABELLED "Pomegranates from land of dead do not eat"]

[I REMOVE A SECOND CONTAINER LABELLED "Fairy apples do not eat (Autumn Court)]

[I APPROACH THE BLENDER]