things @ablasphemyofpoets - Tumblr Blog

chemicalico

who wanna be friends with drawbacks

eatthekidsfirst

friends with consequences

#a certain someone I know

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miss-americanbi

grace you gotta lock in

#project hail mary #me @ my boss

moveslikekeithrichards

working with little kids is so dangerous. you get one kid who has a unique way of speaking & then spend the rest of your life with an internal monologue like “me’s go bathroom?”

moveslikekeithrichards

other thrilling destructions of my vocabulary:

the kid who replaced his hard G sounds with soft ones, leaving me incapable of thinking of glasses as anything other than jlasses

kid who would holler "DID" any time she finished her work no matter how many times we told her to just raise her hand

kid who began her scary stories with "once a time" and her friend who began his with "paw time"

middle schooler i had during student teaching who pronounced magritte as "mah-gritty"

the kid who said "i got boogies comin out my nose" while sobbing and the kid who said "theres his puddle of cry" while describing a drawing, both of whom i think of when im crying

kid who said that if he was 80 he would get big and turn grandpa

kid who, for no reason in particular, would just say "like a little feet" as a standalone phrase in relation to nothing

edit how could i forget. the kid who got sneezed on and angrily said "whyd you blessyou on me"

hollowedskin

My niece who asks people with dogs "are him big or him little?"

And every person without fail answers "uh.. him big"

draconym

Years later my vocabulary is still influenced by:

kid who called snakes "nakes"

kid who called calculators "cockulators"

my little cousin who referred to anything he didn't have an immediate answer to as "vewy mystewious"

"I don't yike heem"

ablasphemyofpoets

It would be so cool if my boss did her goddamn job.

ablasphemyofpoets

I’m going to kill someone, I texted to ask if we were still meeting today at our regularly scheduled time, and also sent the main question I need answered. She responded to say no we’re not meeting BUT DIDNT ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION.

#personal #I want to quit so bad

It would be so cool if my boss did her goddamn job.

#personal #15 minutes and I’m making my own decision on this #I’m not going to be here until 8 pm because she can’t get back to me and I can’t get started

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airlocksandaviariesarchive

2 genres of fanfiction:

1) put that guy into situations

2) take that guy OUT of situations for the love of GOD let them REST

ckret2

#you put the sad guy in #you take the sad guy out #you put the sad guy in and you shake him all about

gracklesascendant

thank you very much londo

anonpolls

If you had so much money that you never had to work again (but were physically able to etc.), would you choose to work? (If you’re already in this situation, choose what you actually did.)

Yes, I’d do the same job I have now.

Yes, but I’d switch to a lower-paying but more fulfilling job.

Yes, but I’d choose to pursue a creative career.

Yes, but I’d start my own business.

Sort of. I’d volunteer or otherwise work without pay.

I wouldn’t work per se, but would devote a lot of time to a hobby.

I’d just relax, have fun, do whatever.

I’m not sure/Other

Remaining time: 1 day 17 hours

Thanks, Anon!

-submit your poll!-

#quit my job until I’m done with my degree #then end up in a job that’s actually higher paying but something I actually want to do long term

Resisting the urge to respond to “how are you” with “upright and breathing.”

#personal #people don’t like it when you answer how are you honestly #was supposed to have a therapy appointment this morning but he’s out sick #goddamnit

burr-ell

YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN HANDLE CRITIQUE. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN EMBRACE BEING TOLD YOU WERE WRONG. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH UNPLEASANT TASKS. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN DELIVER DISAPPOINTING NEWS. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU KNOW HOW TO BE DISAGREED WITH. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN BE CORRECTED. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN BE TOLD YOU MESSED UP. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU ARE ABLE TO DO HARD THINGS.

bigbigtruck

quotes taken from the source

(the 4th one is Bumpus wanting dinner, friends can back me up on this)

saxifraga-x-urbium

come back to me most perfect of comics

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mrsterlingeverything

It is thursday morning. Visualize yourself as the marble, the chisel, and the untrained sculpter who just tried methamphetamine

bells-lettres

local matchmaker losing it over yet another unrealistic demand from the clientele 🤣🤣

Translation by me. :))

elodieunderglass

“Even a slightly increased possibility of summoning rain is still an ability to summon rain” is such a good point

havingapoemwithyou

Scientific method by James Tadd Adcox

ablasphemyofpoets

I hate my job.

ablasphemyofpoets

The (redacted) was not my fault, I hate my job slightly less.

ablasphemyofpoets

On hour 9 of my 8 hour work day, not sure when I’ll be done, I hate my job again.

ablasphemyofpoets

Got to leave after 10 hours. If I quit, the whole lab goes down. I am the only person trained to do my job. Can you imagine if a business relied entirely on one underpaid guy who had to work nights, weekends, and holidays to function? Only in academia!

#personal #they’re saying they might have to cut my hours because we don’t have any money #you better figure something out because I’ll go down to 30 hours/week #but if I lose my benefits I’m leaving and good fucking luck #the unpaid intern who can kinda sorta do my job poorly is also done when school starts #love you Alex don’t know why you’re still working here for free #sorry I’m asking you to come in over the weekend if you say no I won’t make you

ablasphemyofpoets

I hate my job.

ablasphemyofpoets

The (redacted) was not my fault, I hate my job slightly less.

ablasphemyofpoets

On hour 9 of my 8 hour work day, not sure when I’ll be done, I hate my job again.

#personal #trying to get my intern to come in over the weekend instead of me #please I want a whole 48 hours off

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vintageandroid

i made a post like this before but I can't find it now. so. I'll just redo it.

What's the first "big news story" you remember from when you were a kid?

It's something I love to ask mixed-aged groups sometimes because I think it's really interesting to see the responses. I've gotten answers from the Olympics of [whatever year] to Watergate to more recent stuff from my niblings.

My first news thing I remember is the OJ Simpson trial. I vaguely remember watching the news with my grandparents before that, but that's the first story I remember, in part because my second grade teacher had us go play so she could watch the verdict 😂

absolutelynotclassicusernam-blog

I remember walking down the street and seeing a sign protesting George W. Bush’s war on Iraq, so I think that.

headspace-hotel

I don't know about a news story, but my first "political" memory was something about the torture memos

#I think it was Calfornia Prop 8 #I was quite young then so it’s possible I’m remembering discussion of it from when I was a few years older #my posts #I do for sure remember the 2008 Olympics though and that was the same year so shrug

There are three chairs in the room I’m working in. Two of them adjust. All of them are the wrong height.

#personal #my back hurts because I’m having to use the too tall chair and hunch over

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