the worm in tham n0phis’ brain

i appreciate the amount of people reblogging this despite me not really tagging this at all. im glad many of people feel the same anger i do.

Why is pet play always dogs anyway

Youre a dirty little goldfish arent you. daddys gonna clean your tank out so good so you have to wait in the sink until im done.

Apparently because you have no idea how to care for anything but a dog

Daddy is not known for his animal husbandry

Uhhh play Prey 2017!

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

just found out I'm going to be reincarnated into a single sprig of grain. barley apparently. Not cool man. I didn't even know plants was an option on the table. this is bullshit

this is going around again and the tags are full of people talking about printing it out to put in their breakroom or cubicle or sending it to their coworkers, which fills me with great joy. vast diversity of professions represented also. zoos. labs. summer camps. restaurants. garden centers. libraries. schools. many reports from the brave warriors of assorted retail. a truth universally acknowledged: if there is a sign a customer will not read it <3 and they don't read emails either <3

Thinking about this again as someone breezes past the “how to find this” quick guide full of screenshots and my slack handle “email Librarian” to send a dm ask ‘does the library have this book?’

I recently started working in hospitality, and I’ll tell you guys right now, the trope of “there was only one bed” is not as rare as you’d think in real life. A few times a week, at least, I have guys come in who are working together on projects in town or passing through who have to literally book the last room I have available for the night and lo and behold — there is only one bed, and guess what, they give each other a side-eyed look and begrudgingly take it. So write it up, it happens all the time!!!

Fanfic imitates life, and life imitates fanfic. It’s full circle really.

New sub-trope: Artificially Orchestrated Bed Scarcity.

following people who are into wrestling is just like "holy shit johnny appleseed just hit burner hurtzog (evil artfilm director-themed wrestler) with the Prostate Puncher 5000! can't fucking stand that guy!" like all day long

thinking about “you haven’t met all the people who will love you” and like!!! you also haven’t found all the things that will make you happy!!!! there will always be new authors and musicians and artists whose work you will one day discover and love!!!! there will always be new hobbies and skills for you to learn and feel fulfilled by!!! there will always be new things around the corner that will bring sudden and unexpected happiness!!!!!!!!!!!