tumblr is so unbalanced like there is so many wizards but barely any like warriors or rogues
Keni
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Xuebing Du
Peter Solarz

Love Begins
One Nice Bug Per Day

izzy's playlists!
dirt enthusiast

tannertan36
Three Goblin Art
$LAYYYTER
noise dept.
Sade Olutola
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Cosimo Galluzzi
Show & Tell
KIROKAZE
macklin celebrini has autism
cherry valley forever
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@aberbach
tumblr is so unbalanced like there is so many wizards but barely any like warriors or rogues

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“Your ancestors are amazed at all your spices!”
“Your ancestors are impressed that you are an educated woman!”
“Your ancestors are proud that you are thriving in spite of what society did to them and you”
It’s all very sweet! But! Necromancy! Is! Still! Illegal! Your ancestors are going back in the ground!
Stop resurrecting them to show off!
goodnight goblins. goodnight ghouls. goodnight screaming tomes and scrolls. goodnight floating glowing eye. goodnight my dear homunculi. goodnight imps and spectral wraiths. goodnight false god that feeds on faith. goodnight bony skeletons. goodnight inert collapsing sun. goodnight monster made of mud. goodnight vampires drinking blood. i wish you all good evil-night. and please do let the bed bugs bite
@monstrousagonies
I had to try reading this aloud. - L
the most disorienting thing thats ever happened to me was when a linguistics major stopped in the middle of our conversation, looked me in the eye, and said, "you have a very interesting vernacular. were you on tumblr in 2014?" and i had to just stand there and process that one for a good ten seconds
#i was in a car with a linguist i had never met before the car trip and like half an hour in he looked at me#after i finished describing a geology thing that was happening out the window and asked if i'd ever spent much time on tumblr#the fuckor of it all#and then we spent six more hours driving#it sure does leave linguistic markers! i'm not sure i'm good with it (tags via @thoughtsformtheuniverse)
it is one thing to be a linguist and another to be a linguist who knows enough of 2010s Tumblr to spot one of its enjoyers
Oh! @meret118 see above comment! The use of the word "enjoyers" instead of "users" or "bloggers" -> You left a comment a while back asking, "Does this just mean vocabulary words? Other than blorbo and sweet cinnamon roll etc, I can't think of what a Tumblr accent would be." I almost never see anyone use the word "enjoyer" anywhere outside of tumblr, but I see it on tumblr fairly frequently.
Another one is the verb "perceive" i.e. "don't perceive me" "I am perceiving" "I am being percieved." That's something that feels very specific to tumblr parlance.
There's the thing where people on tumblr have an emotional reaction to something and instead of, or in addition to telling you how they feel about it using emotion words, they will narrate a fictional action in the present progressive tense. "I am gnawing at the bars of my enclosure "I am kissing you on the mouth" "you are going into the soup" "you are getting all of the awards"
I once saw someone use that response format in ... I think it was a restaurant review, or a doordash review, or something like that. It was very unexpected seeing it outside of a tumblr post.
There are a lot of other tumblr linguistic quirks I can't currently remember off the top of my head, but I'll instantly recognize them if I see/hear them outside of tumblr. It's always a bit startling to see them out of context.
when I was in university one of my modules was about internet slang and for our grades project we had to compile and analyse a small database of 100 words used by a specific community of our choice. I chose tumblr and that's how I stumbled across Gretchen McCulloch's research and discovered that yes not only did tumblr have its own vernacular and syntax (as @lierdumoa demonstrates), it was at the time a crucible of slang and memes probably unrivalled by any other part of the internet. and it's stayed that way! even the very title is McCulloch's book because internet is an example of this specific phraseology.
sadly my project is lost due to the website being wiped from the university database after graduation and my then laptop having a major hardware failure. backup your backups people! but the crux of the entire module was that the internet is full of communities using language not only as jargon for specific purpose but also to signal membership in said community. I even wrote a bit about non capitalisation and punctuation useage as a visual cue on tumblr and how including information in the reblog body or the tags indicated different levels of importance or intimacy of thought
I am holding the side of your face and looking deep in your eyes and telling you that love is stored in the syntax, and that we are rotating words together all at once as we all nod at their new and baffling meanings. if the devils sacrament be tumblr then the devils gospel is our collective voice. thanks for coming to my tedtalk
I am being perceived.
From: [email protected]
Subject: Phylactery maintenance
Hey boss,
In the handbook it says standard procedure is “Phylactery upkeep is to be done Bi-Monthly, no more no less” but the other cronies and I are conflicted if that mean twice a month or once every two months? We wanna make sure our surplus of young souls and blood sacrifices is in proper stock so seeing if we gotta quadruple or quarter our spending will really make or break the whole “Eternal Life” operation we got going here.
Also side note: should I message IT about how every time the word Phylactery is typed out in the system it automatically turns green? Or is that by design?
In mournful servitude,
Henchmen 2883 (Frank)
From: [email protected]
Subject: Vexed Me For The Last Time
you’re supposed to do it once a month, bisexually. how many times have you been doing it??
- EW

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dog i gotta move like yesterday
truly some people have no genre savviness whatsoever. A girl came back from the dead the other day and fresh out of the grave she laughed and laughed and lay down on the grass nearby to watch the sky, dirt still under her nails. I asked her if she’s sad about anything and she asked me why she should be. I asked her if she’s perhaps worried she’s a shadow of who she used to be and she said that if she is a shadow she is a joyous one, and anyway whoever she was she is her, now, and that’s enough. I inquired about revenge, about unfinished business, about what had filled her with the incessant need to claw her way out from beneath but she just said she’s here to live. I told her about ghosts, about zombies, tried to explain to her how her options lie between horror and tragedy but she just said if those are the stories meant for her then she’ll make another one. I said “isn’t it terribly lonely how in your triumph over death nobody was here to greet you?” and she just looked at me funny and said “what do you mean? The whole world was here, waiting”. Some people, I tell you.
sorry I love this painfully mid media so much I could throw up
something something extremely sexy when magic users resort to physical violence. yeah i have the power of god and anime on my side but i also have THESE HANDS. i cast Punch You In The Face. i take my magic staff through which i channel the vast energies of the elements and the cosmos and i cast Severe Concussion And Skull Fracture. casting time for xenoglossy too long, chose the quicker route of Stab You In The Throat.
Wizard tip: If you die before you write your stories down, they die with you. With no other hearts and minds to sustain them, their worlds collapse and fade. Never properly brought into a universe and existences of their own, they simply disappear.
You must write them down to save them. Spill them across the pages of our world to give them an anchor and a root. An outline is a tenuous thread that can be spun into the web of a new world!
You are the progenitor of new universes, will you make them rot inside you instead?

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explaining to my doctor that im getting artifacts in my vision but its not like floaters or anything i just keep seeing an ancient staff and a cursed dagger and shit wherever i look
istheveilbetweenworldsthinrightnow.com
Veil status: normal
Tomorrow's veil: normal to thick
Download the app for convenient, add-free updates on the invisible barrier separating the material realm from the astral plane
apparently some idiot on the Wizard council lost his tharxian warding crystal in the suction dimension and broke the great circle keeping the demon lord Pentalagon in his spectral sarcophagus. so like. that was my evil plan. i spent 3,000 years working on this and they just started the Thaumaclysm on accident. what am i supposed to do with all this mayonnaise now
maidens if you are going to flee dramatically from my castle in the middle of the night once i reveal my true nature to you please leave your candelabra on the little ledge by the portcullis we are running out of them
starting to think these maidens are stumbling in soaked through from the rain just to steal my beautiful gowns and homewear are any of you actually lost
At the checkout in Home Goods loading the belt with nothing but candelabras in all shapes & sizes while the cashier watches sympathetically and asks if it’s the maidens again
“I want you to do this with me for one month. One month. Write 10 observations a week and by the end of four weeks, you will have an answer. Because when someone writes about the rustic gutter and the water pouring through it onto the muddy grass, the real pours into the room. And it’s thrilling. We’re all enlivened by it. We don’t have to find more than the rustic gutter and the muddy grass and the pouring cold water.”
— Marie Howe, Boston University’s 2016 Theopoetics Conference (via mothersofmyheart)
Marie Howe:
I ask my students every week to write 10 observations of the actual world. It’s very hard for them.
Ms. Tippett:
Really?
Ms. Howe:
They really find it hard.
Ms. Tippett:
What do you mean? What is the assignment? 10 observations of their actual world?
Ms. Howe:
Just tell me what you saw this morning like in two lines. I saw a water glass on a brown tablecloth, and the light came through it in three places. No metaphor. And to resist metaphor is very difficult because you have to actually endure the thing itself, which hurts us for some reason.
Ms. Tippett:
It does.
Ms. Howe:
It hurts us.
Ms. Tippett:
You naming something.
Ms. Howe:
We want to say, “It was like this; it was like that.” We want to look away. And to be with a glass of water or to be with anything — and then they say, “Well, there’s nothing important enough.” And that’s whole thing. It’s the point.
Ms. Howe:
It’s the this, right?
Ms. Howe:
Right, the this, whatever. And then they say, “Oh, I saw a lot of people who really want” — and, “No, no, no. No abstractions, no interpretations.” But then this amazing thing happens, Krista. The fourth week or so, they come in and clinkety, clank, clank, clank, onto the table pours all this stuff. And it so thrilling. I mean, it is thrilling. Everybody can feel it. Everyone is just like, “Wow.” The slice of apple, and then that gleam of the knife, and the sound of the trashcan closing, and the maple tree outside, and the blue jay. I mean, it almost comes clanking into the room. And it’s just amazing.
Ms. Tippett:
In some basic level, what they’ve done is just engage with their senses.
Ms. Howe:
Yeah, and have been present out of their minds and just noticing what’s around them, which is — we don’t do. And again, not to compare it to anything. They’re not allowed. And that’s very hard for them. And then on the fifth or sixth week, I say, “OK, use metaphors.” And they don’t want to. They don’t know how. They’re like, “Why would I? Why would I compare that to anything when it’s itself?” Exactly. Good question.
So then you think, why the necessity of a metaphor? Why do you have to use a metaphor now? Not just to do it to avoid it, but to do it to make it more there. And it’s very interesting.
The words and silences we live by. The rituals that sustain us. The poetry of ordinary time.

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what's my kink? hmm i don't know i guess i don't have any
are they gone? okay. you are a knight and i am your childhood friend but the key point is we've been in love for years and years and years and every time you come back from a quest i'm there.
and every time, i wipe the blood from your face and bandage your wounds, and you catch my hand and press it harder over the cloth, and it hurts you but it feels good, too, because it's my hand that's doing it, and because of this quiet unspoken thing between us that will never be because of the oaths you've made to others.
and then one day an enemy of yours tracks me down and i am your one weakness, and you came back to the quiet village and i am not there, and the houses are burning, and you raze every inch of ground between us
but it's a trap (obviously it's a trap) and you are caught and i am there, and your enemy vows to destroy your world as you have destroyed his (and this is how i find out that you are not the good person i thought you were) (and how i find out that i don't care, i'll have you anyway, if we survive this thing)
and then while you are restrained your enemy hurts me just to see you scream, and i won't beg even though nothing has ever hurt this bad, and you are raging against your chains, with this look in your eye that's fear, not rage, because for all your vows i am the only thing you love.
and then you get free and you kill him and you toss his body aside like it doesn't even matter (because it doesn't, only i matter, i am the only thing in the world) and you undo my bindings with shaking hands and you say damn my oaths, i will slay a thousand kings if you ask it of me, and i smile finally with blood on my teeth and you kiss me
send post
dream a little dream of me