Wyman The Walrus

28 year old tumblr users will look at you and say do you remember thwomp day of 2013 when everyone was posting thwomp from mario 64 in different audio

“We should nuke them” “No, no, I’m telling you: carpet bombs would save money”

one of these big new indie cartoons should release with an exclusive adopt of like the main character. pay up 10000 dollars to be the only one whos legally allowed to draw pomni. i feel like the resulting fandom drama would change the face of the internet it would be so cool

yeah hi this is actually a horrible idea why would you want this

i like when bad things happen

always interesting whenever people start talking about polyamory as particularly unstable or prone to jealousy bc it begs the question of if they’ve ever seen or heard of monogamous couples

are you aware that those people are having sincere earnest discussions on whether following someone on social media counts as cheating

I can't believe he's dead. It feels like just yesterday Lindsay Graham and I were just young boys playing down by the creek. "CT buddy, one day I'm gonna start a war with Iran" he would tell me, "and then by god I'm gonna immediately lose and die." Well look where we are now old friend. Look where we are now.

“We asked Senator Lindsey Graham to expound his views on civil liberties earlier today, but our interview request was declined. Instead, we received a package from his office on Capitol Hill containing an 8-track tape of him laughing for 37 minutes, accompanied by a Xerox print of his penis.”

My first Lindsey Graham hatepost was made in 2013.

scientists have recently announced that exoplanet HR 3499a is no longer believed to be potentially capable of supporting life, after new spectroscopic readings indicated that it doesn't even have a dishwasher. "i mean, it doesn't even have a fucking dishwasher," said the lead researcher. "I guess you could live there, but, like, would you really want to?"

i dont mean to victim blame but why do these vampires keep talking to daniel molloy when they know he's daniel molloy