I do the throw the phone thing, but I also set a 20second timer before doing it
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I do the throw the phone thing, but I also set a 20second timer before doing it

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A fun thing about computer skills is that as you have more of them, the number of computer problems you have doesn't go down.
This is because as a beginner, you have troubles because you don't have much knowledge.
But then you learn a bunch more, and now you've got the skills to do a bunch of stuff, so you run into a lot of problems because you're doing so much stuff, and only an expert could figure them out.
But then one day you are an expert. You can reprogram everything and build new hardware! You understand all the various layers of tech!
And your problems are now legendary. You are trying things no one else has ever tried. You Google them and get zero results, or at best one forum post from 1997. You discover bugs in the silicon of obscure processors. You crash your compiler. Your software gets cited in academic papers because you accidently discovered a new mathematical proof while trying to remote control a vibrator. You can't use the wifi on your main laptop because you wrote your own uefi implementation and Intel has a bug in their firmware that they haven't fixed yet, no matter how much you email them. You post on mastodon about your technical issue and the most common replies are names of psychiatric medications. You have written your own OS but there arent many programs for it because no one else understands how they have to write apps as a small federation of coroutine-based microservices. You ask for help and get Pagliacci'd, constantly.
But this is the natural of computer skills: as you know more, your problems don't get easier, they just get weirder.
you know you've made it when you're googling problems and ending up with 0-9 results
#you don't actually have to be good to have these problems#you just have to be obsessed with a micro-issue that no one else cares about
Certified skydiving instructors know way more about safely falling from planes than I do, and are way more likely to die that way.
The science behind THC + alcohol as a combination is literally soo interesting because it basically causes the crimson red duckling in your body to confront the serpent in the bronze vessel of your heart. Basically you feel good because the duckling is able to eat the harmonious seeds stored within the vessel and transfer these positive energies into your body. You can have bad highs when this happens if the duckling awakens the serpent and it bites the duckling. The interesting part is when you ingest alcohol after THC because it floods the vessel and causes the serpent to fall into a deep sleep. The duckling never gets attacked by the serpent when this happens because it is unconscious and the duckling is actually able to get fat from the harmonious seed, which causes an enjoyable sensation.
The science behind THC + alcohol as a combination is literally soo interesting because it basically causes the crimson red duckling in your body to confront the serpent in the bronze vessel of your heart. Basically you feel good because the duckling is able to eat the harmonious seeds stored within the vessel and transfer these positive energies into your body. You can have bad highs when this happens if the duckling awakens the serpent and it bites the duckling. The interesting part is when you ingest alcohol after THC because it floods the vessel and causes the serpent to fall into a deep sleep. The duckling never gets attacked by the serpent when this happens because it is unconscious and the duckling is actually able to get fat from the harmonious seed, which causes an enjoyable sensation.
what’s the rush?

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Metahuman with super healing powers whose entire job is that once a week they go to a nearby hospital and are put into a medically induced coma for 24 hours while all their organs and blood are harvested, and kept there until they've healed up again.
They get paid a small stipend by the Heroes Council for this, and they live off that.
No crime fighting, no obvious heroics, and they only took a Super Identity because it's technically hero's council policy. Nobody's ever seen them in a cape.
Every so often the Heroes council will release an official report to the public, and there'll be another bunch of news articles wondering how some unknown super calling themselves 'Meat Factory' somehow consistently holds the record for most lives saved across the city.
It is essential to my vision that they are not at all sanctimonious about this.
Like, they regularly act like they're getting away with something. They joke about how they get to earn money in their sleep. They show up to their hospital visits in deliberately ridiculous disguises, on the excuse that they need to 'protect their identity'.
Part of their employment contract is that they get served the same post-operation vanilla ice cream that they normally hand out on the childrens' ward. Also a sticker. Their overnight bag is covered in stickers.
Okay, Meat Factory is awesome and hilarious, but if they're being harvested for and regenerating absolutely everything, may I suggest an alternative super name: Theseus.
Because I'm a biologist and a complete freak, I sometimes amuse myself thinking about like a super ultra advanced alien race that 'conquers' our planet, but instead of being all 'War of the Worlds' about it, they aren't even conquering, as far as they're concerned. There are no inteligent life forms on this planet, after all, just little animals, and they're clearly on the endangered species list. A perfect place to study rare wildlife on an untouched planet.
So there's an alien research station in space. Humanity's worst attempts to destroy it amount to a bear turning over the trash can. Aliens occasionally abduct people and return them with a clean bill of health and an ankle bracelet. It takes them forever to figure out those bracelets are screwing with their data because humans who carry them are curve-wreckingly popular.
Disaster strikes somewhere, I dunno, Japan, and there's an uptick in abductions, but of people stuck in collapsed buildings, and yeah the giant octopus tree that looks straight out of Call of Cthulhu is scary but it's also using tech you can't even comprehend to find survivors and teleport them out of the rubble. You see humans with absolutely 100% deadly injuries wisked away and a good number of them even return. There is now a new consent form specifying if rescuers can take you to the aliens, because they will probably try to save you but if they can't your family will never get your body back. You decide if your life or your body is more important.
Little by little, pragmatism wins out. The aliens aren't attacking, but they ARE abducting and doing weird tests. But the survivors mostly return unharmed with a Big Mac in hand and a weird piece of tech. There have been less valid excuses to miss school. The aliens are clearly researching humanity just as much as we are researching them, and until communications are established this status quo isn't the worst.
Ofc, then one of them actually attacks. Knocks the statue of liberty clean off. The military starts to deploy fast, and even wounds the attacker a lot, but before they can shoot the second missle it bounces. And it turns on the shooter. Every military person in the attack dies, suddenly and through means you cannot comprehend. The other aliens whisk the attacking one away. Construction materials appear as if in apology, but that's it.
The attacker was a hooligan who thought destroying wildlife was fun, and ran into something they can't handle. But even if the bear is perfectly within its rights to defend its territory, the ranger will atill have to shoot it to save the stupid brat, and hope the idiot learned their lesson.
But the bear is still dead. And the forest critters who had just started getting used to the ranger are now having second thoughts.
But the abductions continue. There are no hooligans for a while. And what else can you do? This is your home, but if the invaders really want to take it, what can you do?
So you try to stay out of their way, if you are in some serious trouble and your chances are already less than 50/50, maybe you seek them out. Sometimes they help. Sometimes they don't.
And sometimes the abductees catch glimpses of something that looks like it might have been human once, but eyes and skin all wrong, speaking incomprehensibly, and rubbing its head on the alien's 'knees'.
You go home to your dog and try not to think about it.
THE REVIEWS ARE IN!
And now let me bliw your mind: Alien equivalent of Steve Irwin, the one madman brave enough to go bother human wildlife in Australia.
ten-foot octopus tree holding me by the scruff of my neck after plucking me from my car:
ç̷͙̞͓̳͙̭͖̞͇̝̓̎̎͛͗̿̃̏̒̑͝r̸͇̠̲̩̩̟̞̥̫̗̞̟͇̭̼͉̈͗̔̑̓̿̓̕͜ȉ̶̧̛̛̩͔̠͖̝͎̘̝͔̖̜̅̆͆̌͊̑͂͒͠ͅk̵̰̟͋̋̈̈͗ę̴̹̟͓͎̖̑̈́̎̕͠ȳ̴̛͇̯̝̲̠̼̮̯͗͛̏́̔͜͜ ̷̼̳̰͖̃̅̈́͐̿́̂͝w̶̨̬͚̝̦͖̟̱̉̌͐̿͆̀̀̿̅̿͌̃̚͜h̶͈̪̰͈͎̍͂̕a̶̢̝̳̠̓͐̈́͐̆̀̽̀̎̾̑͝ͅţ̶̹̣͙͚̬̩̥͌̉͋̽̄̊̚ ̷̗̠̩̻̮̞̒̈́̏̿̏̌̈́͑̒͑́͘͜͝ͅå̵̡̧͔͚̖̜̦̬̥̻̭̂́̀̓̍͛̄͐̃͆̕̚͝͝ ̴̡̨̤̰̺̻̪̞̬̼͛̈͠b̶̛̛̻̳̫͙̩̪̲̲̫̱͉̺̂͊̉̅̓̎́̽̾̈̊̉̈́̕͠ͅe̷̢̲̣̻̝̯͙͔̜̭̻͕͛̓a̷̖͓̥̯̝̥̙̺̥̺̫̹͛̀͆̎̋̊̒̅̚̕͝u̷̻̟̣͕̪͍͇̼̭̜̝̲̞͓̗̽̈́̅̈́̂̇̒͠ͅt̴̘̩͎͓̰͍́̐̂̂́̂͗̒̏̑̀̈̓͊̚͝y̵̛̠͉̠̲̥͋͌́̀͆ ̵̨͍͈̳͕̱͋͗͌́̔̾̽̄͆́̇
It's crazy that you're can just learn about something for real. I wanted to know more about magic now I do. It never stops.
I just want to remind everyone that it is possible to learn things for real in real life.
the vivid sensory-memory of sucking water out of a washcloth as a child
Non cooking spray stick
Non spray stick cooking
Non cooking stick spray
yeah okay ill reblog that

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why not have the reader re-read a sentence now and then? it won't hurt him....
Ahh the 80's when anything was possible if you had enough blow in your system.
this sounds like a party to me
Wei Weaving is a Chinese artist
I'm begging you to turn the sound on
Spring.
Spring.
Spring.
Spring.
Spring.
✨️GOLDEN.......✨️
Mouse 🐁
Everytime this crosses my dash my eyes light up because I know my favourite part is coming. Spring. Spring. Spring. Spring. Spring.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
"Just because I'm right, doesn't mean I'm being helpful" is a vastly underrated thought process that I strongly encourage others to get comfortable with
Hey op thanks for fundamentally rearranging my molecules in some helpful way this fine evening
being a jack of all trades is dope as fuck honestly. it's like I'm doing crop rotation inside my own brain