Lady of the Valkyrior @valkyrja237 - Tumblr Blog

a little morning routine compilation of my envoy

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briannyssey

Oh easy mistake. Yearning actually rises from the floor and longing hangs from the ceiling

briannyssey

🥺🥺

pathos-logical

[ID copied from alt: Tags reading “reaching out to each other…?” End ID]

murkymarco

Caught myself spiraling and then remembered it's just my body not wanting to exist in these temperatures

lichposting

I’m really enamored with the dynamic of two characters who work perfectly in tandem, like pacific rim drift compatible level, but they don’t like each other. It’s not even as strong an emotion as hate it’s just a very neutral-negative dislike, but they still act in perfect concert and their individual abilities are fully complementary

lichposting

fishing-princess

I will be patient with myself for being disabled I will be patient with myself for being disabled I will be patient with myself for being disabled if I keep saying it it might come true

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c-rowlesdraws

nap rotisserie...

(a twist: this is all the same nap... they're just very chaotic sleepers)

c-rowlesdraws

the sequel

kiburebuc

that is a fucking insane amount of donuts, theres like 6 people in this room

it looks like an edit or something bit irs just in the show like this

kiburebuc

this has to be a joke, theyre all double stacked

kiburebuc

cooper dissociates while albert is absolutely flabbergasted by the insurmountable quantity of donuts

hadesisqueer

Two World Cup finalists from opposing teams in this fucking picture, this sport isn't real

hadesisqueer

Context for anyone who is wondering: Lamine Yamal's parents won an UNICEF raffle for a charity photoshoot in which Barça players posed with kids, and 5 month old Lamine happened to get 20yo Messi. Which is like. Literally insane

joyflameball

baked-fish

I hate to say "some of you don't go outside," but fucking Christ, dude

hunbunqueen

Ouuhh I see the water it’s right there on the post,, I’m so thirsty ouyghhhhhw just one sip for me ooouuuuuu

baked-fish

Girl, what are you talking about? Are you feeling alright?

beneaththegildedmoon

Btw the heat *is* why we see water that's not really there, but mirages aren't exactly hallucinations so much as optical illusions:

It's just the changing density of the air refracting light weirdly, so it looks like there's a reflection of the sky on the ground, which our brains often interpret as a pool of water. It can also happen upwards instead of downwards, especially at sea, when the air is much colder near the surface and a warm front appears above it:

Which, btw, is one possible explanation for ghost ship sightings, so that's fun :)

rainbowgod666

Yeap. That's how the Effetto Fata Morgana gappens

ausefulblogforputtingthingsin

If you drive on a straight road in the summer you can see mirages pretty easily.

Here's Fata Morgana

spaceshipsandpurpledrank

@jorality

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salmakiis

the city of brass

crashdavis

asked my students if they wanted to share stories about what they did over spring break and this kid goes "you know the field behind costco?" and we all nod and he says "I got lost in the field behind costco."

tarragonthedragon

i just got the "see where your blood has gone!" email from giving blood but it glitched and just showed me my current location. which. theyre not wrong. that is where most of my blood is

kikmessenger

sits on my own blog like it’s the edge of a lake wistfully

kikmessenger

skips a stone over a few posts

ferrettaur

So like an hour ago I just lear🪨︵︵ned that— what the fuck was that. Someone just skipped a rock across my post did you see that

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not-your-average-url

I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.

I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.

kaity--did

Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk

“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”

kaity--did

Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?

Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby

Husband: RIVETING!

kaity--did

Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️

Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!

kaity--did

Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk

All of tumblr collectively at my husband:

kaity--did

Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream

Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!

Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued

Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.

kaity--did

THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND

yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this

kaity--did

Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays

Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.

????

kaity--did

Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave

Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!

kaity--did

FYI this is how you get a Deals Warlock if you were wondering

justplainsalty

I have follow up questions:

1) Did you participate in baby talk to make up for your husband's deficit, or did you also opt to speak to the Deals Warlock like a very tiny adult from babyhood?

1a) If you participated in baby talk with Penny, did she ever do any code switching with you while she was learning to talk (I mean, babyish talk back to you but fully formed adult like you share with us to Lawyer Dad)?

kaity--did

I didn't baby talk with her very much either! I think I squealed at her more than my husband did.

Something funny that has happened is that while she formally calls me Mama when she's answering me in passing she does call me "My Darling Love" and I don't know for sure but I think it's because I call her and her father "my loves" and her father calls me and her "darlings" and she's created a mash up 😂

So I'll say "okay penny it's time for bed" and I'll just hear "okay my darling love!" 😂

kaity--did

Everyone is always so so kind on this post but I do want to warn you all that this did in fact lead to an insanely verbal child, and if you choose that life you have to commit to that life.

Penny Rose is now 5 years old and she

1. Starts talking the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she passes out at night

2. Asks, and I am not exaggerating I counted, an average of 892 questions a day

3. Does not accept "I don't know" as an answer to said questions, will usually have a follow up question as to why you don't know OR a suggestion on how we can find out together

I pay for limitless data and have 709 Google tabs open on my phone at all times

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