What a bloody mess...

wouldn't you like to know, brunch boy? you sandwich-eating so-and-so.

no offense to the english but i just found out england has only ever won the world cup once.. wtf do you mean “it’s coming home” she doesn’t even know you omg

maybe if we keep speculating about mitch mcconnell more different repub senators will drop dead

UNGRATEFUL tech companies are saying things like "turn off your ad blocker" and "we need your photo id" instead of "thank you so much for not just pirating our shit, youre so handsome"

mitch mcconnell is siphoning the life force off other politicians

gonna be honest i don’t know how many more ‘enter the 6 digit code we sent to your phone’s i got left in me

Tumblr’s one true talent is making me sick of things I’ve never seen or read or heard.

I never see a whole family driving in a cyber truck. It’s always one man all alone.

“there’s an ai tool for that” okay ?? there’s probably an ed sheeran song for it too who gives a fuck

me when I just don't buy the ludicrously overpriced game

gamers will also go "vote with your wallets" about everything and then proceed to not do that

Happy 3 year anniversary to this post, Zach Galifianakis still haunts me in my fucking dreams like the predator

I say “difficult difficult lemon difficult” so often that if I just say something is “difficult,” my wife asks if it’s lemon difficult. If I say no, she says, “Orange you glad it’s not lemon difficult?”

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges