*clever title* @unlimitedpuns - Tumblr Blog

hjartasalt

See him sweeties

hjartasalt

He's so sweeties!

hjartasalt

Now see him fabulous

hjartasalt

Now see him. In the dark.

hjartasalt

My pet comma/kidney bean/some sort of slug

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midiport

im going to explode in the kiln

importantcatpics

segamascott

supreme-leader-stoat

This is true but I'm gonna be controversial for a second and say that I feel bad for jocks who get hit with The Injury™️too. The Injury™️ fucking sucks, man. Having something that everyone praised you for when you were young suddenly betray you and having to grapple with both a sudden loss of ability (whether it's something that can be recovered from or not) and figure out what your future looks like now that the one you had imagined for yourself (whether it was actually realistic or not) feels like it's been snatched away is brutal.

evilwriter37

Yeah, like, maybe we shouldn't be shaming/making fun of people for either of these things!

dhaaruni

This is very good

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femalegothic

men just love to run their fucking mouth about what women do or do not want without even once considering consulting any actual women on the matter

Nike’s viral track kit is just one part of the story.

(cnn) — When Olympian Tess Howard put on her new uniform for Great Britain’s women’s field hockey team in 2021, she

The Norwegian women’s beach handball team has been fined after players opted to wear shorts instead of bikini bottoms during a European cham

Female athletes are breaking with their sports' apparel conventions -- if not regulations -- to prioritize their comfort during competitions

Sports Commentary Historically, women in sports have not garnered the same respect as men, though they perform the same tasks and play the s

Pole vaulter Holly Bradshaw refused to wear the customary bikini bottoms and crop tops favored by the majority of female athletes.

According to Women in Sport, 78 percent of girls avoid participating in sports while on their period. 78 percent. CEO of Women in Sport, St

batmanisagatewaydrug

Tumblr being the "piss on the poor" reading comprehension site makes sense when you realize that 79% of adults in the US are functionally illiterate. Same goes for Twitter and TikTok.

that's a real high number, sport. where'd you get it?

batmanisagatewaydrug

hey anon

please tell me you didn't google "US literacy rates" and then make the funniest possible mistake one could make in that situation

parkchanwoohoo

ashlgcostumes

As someone who is both trans and has a child, absolutely hilarious to me that society presents one of these as absolutely only to be done if you are 110% certain and have proved to several people that you want it bad enough and are ready, and the other is like. You might as well everyone else does. Just do it nobody feels ready. You don’t want to? Yes you do

Especially since one of those is pretty reversible if you change your mind after a couple years and the other one, well, technically but that’s pretty frowned upon

pangur-and-grim

reading with my creatures

pangur-and-grim

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gallusrostromegalus

A cat is a machine that turns proteins into violence.

starathsbunker

#Helios was declawed by his former owners so he doesn't just slap things he dislikes like most cats#he really only feels confident in hissing at them#Especially because a lot of the thing he doesn't like are bugs and those are sharp sometimes :(#Selene has figured this out and now when she hears him hiss she sprints over the kill the fuck out of the bug#Helios has learned she will do this so he'll hiss at stuff louder and louder until she hears him#A nervous old man and his emotional support homicidal maniac tags by @gallusrostromegalus

I couldn't reblog without the tags because the context is hilarious

gallusrostromegalus

A Nervous Old Man (right) and his Emotional Support Violence Machine (Left)

Yes, he is more than twice her size. Yes, he is five times her age. Yes, he cries like a big baby until she kills Unacceptable Scary Things (earwigs) for him.

makingtrouble

It's my cat's birthday (anniversary of me getting him) so I told him the story of his life while petting him real good

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.

Now you've lived with me for five years. Five is like the number of toe beans on one of your feet. When I clip your nails five is when we're halfway done. But we're hopefully not even halfway done with how long we get to be together. I'm gonna have to figure out new ways to help you count.

makingtrouble

Actually I've decided this is a poem

targetedknowledge

raven-matrices

Absolute gold in the replies

black mackerel tabby

@kittybroker

let me. innnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

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starshadowx2

Look at you, hacker, a pathetic creature of meat and bone. How can you challenge a perfect, immortal machine?

hauntedcephalopod

deadpowol

tahthetrickster

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