read my posts boy

everyone wants masc carpenter trade until his rough calloused handjob sands your thing down small and smooth as a river stone

the most important virtues for the young woman are as follows: time theft, selfishness, orgasms, irreverence to authority, sacrilegious behavior, a questioning mind, and eating regular meals.

Hold on, let me look something up real quick

Yeah this is funny

It’s just a joke dude. It doesn’t mean anything. Information has no coherent structure . Ideas don’t touch reality

Did you hear a new love language just dropped? yeah its crazy. Its called just fuckin biting them.

reblogging this but shaking my head the whole time to show i don't believe in love languages

they told me not to get lost in the weeds, but these are lush, beautiful, and ecologically necessary native plants so it's probably fine

i feel like it's absolutely crucial in the social justice world to take "he a little confused but he got the spirit" and similar sentiments/situations as a Win. intent is so much more important than saying it right the first time! if someone is approaching with scuffed language and incorrect terms but they're visibly being as polite as they know how, that person is a friend and should be treated better than what their words might invite in someone else's mouth.

someone who's confused but who's got the spirit has the best thing, which is respect. the other stuff is secondary. I'd take someone who's messing up but doing their best to treat me respectfully any day over someone who's using the right words to do me wrong.

Someone who’s messing up on the vocabulary and protocol but has the spirit of respect and good intent, crucially, will listen when you explain to them how to say or do it better.

When I say "godspeed" (I say it a lot) I like to imagine I'm a member of a futurism religion that worships velocity above all else. Like its the standard well-wishing in my culture. Speedliness is next to godliness. Someday we'll catch him! And the closer we get the more he loves us

those other guys are just roleplaying. i'm a real freak. i don't trust tapwater. i'm inbred. smoking me out is like trying to smoke out a warehouse. i get drunk off of 2 beers. i'm scared of Walmart. ever had real freak before? you will immediately feel the difference. the ride is smoother, the controls are more responsive. you've been driving shopping carts until now. are you in the right headspace to hear some shit like "batter up!" before you get fucked? i'm 5 foot 6. i don't have insurance. i'm trying to move to your state before we even enter the talking phase. i'll get a passport to fuck. you think you can have it all with a genuine freak? have it writ upon thy meagre grave. i escaped from a lab where scientists work round the clock creating artificial life- genetically bioengineered to drive your pussy insane. ready for a real freak? once you've seen the stroke you can never go back. my ears ring 24/7. all i do is train. spending a night with me is like spending a night doing the super mario 64 speedrun stair glitch. send me an email.

girl are you a medieval executioner bc you are torturing me with your rack

look i WISH more horror movies were just the directors thinly disguised fetish. instead we got all these horror movies that are just undisguised reflections of culturally hegemonic values and anxieties. like if we got some weird fetishes up in here it would probably add some variety thats all im saying.

christopher nolan great gatsby where jay sits down by the pool before he’s shot and says “our roaring twenties are collapsing”