i got so fucking romantic, i apologize

everytime u go outside ur spending $60 automatically its crazy $60 is the new $20

That's not him

you gotta come to the club man drinks are $18 and were all on our phones googling dog surgery

staring at the dessert menu and twirling my hair and going "should I be baaaaddd" until the autistic girl I'm eating with says "there is nothing bad about eating dessert. it is a morally neutral action"

i feels like there’s something missing in me that the rest of the world has and it’s not fair

if he has abs he doesnt care about you

men with abs aren’t capable of love

every body please be nice to puppys and hug it and other such

Children aged 36-48 report their lives as “better than nothing I guess.”

the milkshake is mean to the meatball but the fry man is more understanding

"muscle mommy" "cardio bunny" these women don't fucking KNOW you bro