Triple threat

the idea that every summer will be as hot if not hotter than this for the rest of my life is unbearable i need to (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) murder an oil executive

character misses their shot and the villain goes "ha! you missed." and the main character goes "did i?" and then shoots the villain again while they're frantically looking around the room for what the hero could possibly have aiming for instead

i hate the notes on this so much so many people are saying shit like "and then the hero shoots the villain while they're looking around!! XD" THAT'S WHAT THE POST ALREADY SAID. THAT'S THE ENTIRE JOKE.

i think this post is improved by the knowledge that i got renamed "punished ant" after getting banned for posting a gift of optimus prime twerking, completely forgot that was my nickname, and didnt understand why i was getting yelled at for typing

ocd will have me thinking i cant text "here now if you wanna head over" because i sound like blowjob mario with a walkie talkie

at the club no drinks.in.fully stone cold sober: what if thsre was a secret city

Face twists with bravery as a chill runs through the air We have to find it.

We have to find it

One of the guys I worked with told us a story about how, when they were doing archaeology surveys in the woods they ran into a bigfoot hunter. Bigfoot guy asked if they had seen signs of bigfoot, and he was like "Sorry, nothing like that. We're archaeologists, so we're looking for human stuff." and the bigfoot guy was like "Oh! I saw some Native American cairns on my way out here. I can give you a general location." and when he was like "Yeah dude, that'd be sick. We're actually looking to document those." the bigfoot guy was like "Yeah, they looked pretty cool. I didn't touch them though, because Native Americans built them, not bigfoot."