The Problematic Puffin

“1450 italy? does it look like I have the time to dye you wool? nO. YOU’RE GOING TO THE 1980s”

“Upper middle class?!?!? You told me upper class! FUCK YEAH THERE’S A DIFFERENCE!!!”

“How about kimoNO.”

“Look me in the eyes. I do not care what you want. This is the 1500s. You absolutely cannot wear trousers.”

“Another court gown?? Here’s a novel idea: go as a peasant for once in your life. Why do you do this to me? You’re fucking sadists that’s why.”

“Don’t mind me, I’ll just be up all night hand painting silk.”

“My allegiance is with you. No one will stand in our way.” Kylo raised his eyes to meet Snoke’s. “No one.”

“My allegiance is with you. No one will stand in our way.” … “No one.”

LIKE….?? HE KILLED SNOKE TO PROTECT REY. SHE LITERALLY GOT IN THEIR WAY. SHE GOT IN KYLO’S WAY. SHE CAME INTO HIS LIFE AND… HIS ALLEGIANCE IS WITH HER NOW. I CAN’T BREATHE HONESTLY YA’LL THIS WAS PLANNED FROM THE BEGINNING AND I’M FUCKING DYING.

THIS QUOTE HE SAID IS A LITERAL FORESHADOWING OF REY COMING IN HIS LIFE. THIS IS A LITERAL FORESHADOWING OF TLJ.

Does no one remember the time Odysseus poked out the Cyclops’ eye and told him his name was “Nobody” and so when they fellow Cyclops asked who’d hurt him, he told them “Nobody”? So then they went about their business? Yeah…….

Mythical Creatures:    Mermaids

“The teddy bear was given to Jessica’s mother as a baby shower gift. After a long life, the bear was no more than part of head and a torn apart body with no stuffing. After a month of research and scouring through 10,000 vintage teddy bears online, Jessica’s fiancee was finally able to obtain the missing pieces of the bear, and had have him brought back to life at the local Teddy Bear Hospital.“

Emotional Labor: What It Is and How To Do It

Mamoudou Gassama, a 22-year old Black man from Mali, without hesitation scaled four stories of a Paris building to save a toddler facing certain death. Mamoudou is an undocumented immigrant. He knew getting caught would mean deportation. 

But instead, France has a new hero. President Macron thanked him, granted him French citizenship plus a job at the French fire brigade.

Bibbity bobbity boo!

“When a woman thinks that her house is on fire, her instinct is at once to rush to thing which she values most. It is a perfectly overpowering impulse, and I have more than once taken advantage of it … A married woman grabs at her baby; an unmarried one reaches for her jewel-box.”

Holmes uses this social norm and order to stage an attack and find out where Adler hid the photo in her house. He drops his guard and is so proud of himself because he knew that this would work, he knew that if he created disorder,  “natural” order would attempt to counteract that disorder.

Adler defies those social orders and norms: she is an untitled American woman who earned her own money through a career as an opera star, instead of relying on a husband or family to have financial security; she outwitted Holmes because she cross-dressed and indicated that she frequently did so, allowing her to have a lot more freedom roaming around London on her own terms, and her stage career aided that so that she could act like a man easily; and she didn’t care one bit about her reputation or being a “pure” woman, had several boyfriends, and was known for being an “adventuress”. More importantly, she had the ability to defy those social norms while simultaneously being able to present herself as the ideal respectable and under-estimable Victorian-era woman.

Adler literally defeats Holmes by dressing in drag then happily goes off with her new husband whom she loves very much. And Holmes respects that and is thoroughly impressed. Not only does he respect that, he realizes that he was on the wrong side of things, that he shouldn’t have agreed to take on the case for the King of Bohemia. This is the exchange that follows after Holmes, Watson and the King read Adler’s letter.

“Would she not have made an admirable queen? Is it not a pity that she was not on my level?”

“From what I have seen of the lady she seems indeed to be on a very different level to your Majesty,” said Holmes coldly

Holmes takes Adler’s side and realizes that the photograph is her protection from the King, not something she intended to use as a weapon against him. Adler never exploited the King to get what she wanted, only kept it as a safeguard of her own happiness. She made sure she had a way of ensuring that she alone guided her future.

Irene Adler is “the woman” to Sherlock Holmes, not because she was sexy or he was in love with her. She was a reminder that real life doesn’t always follow what social norms and order are to be expected, that people shouldn’t be taken on face value or respected just because of their title or apparent respectability and ability to follow social order and norms, and that there are two sides to every story.

their arms are similar to our tongues in that their muscle fibers are  oriented in three different directions 

octopuses are disconcertingly strong (anecdotal evidence says that a 15 inch wide octopus was as strong as the scientist handling it)

on that note that same scientist said that when her octopuses escaped she would have to run behind them, “like cats” (paraphrased from sy montgomery’s the soul of an octopus)

aquariums have “octopus enriching programs” so they don’t get bored and fuck shit up in their tanks

they are crazy smart like. really. really fucking smart 

but we can’t compare their intelligence to ours because our evolution branched from the same common ancestor so long ago we cannot comprehend how they think

it’s believed that their intelligence evolved when they lost their shell, and had to adapt to predict how countless of different prey and predators would act, how to avoid them, distract them, lure them or trick them 

they visualize how other creatures are going to act, which means they have have awareness that others are individuals which is a type of consciousness but i can’t remember what it’s called right now 

like, they use tools 

they have distinct personalities 

aquarium octopuses are socialized from a very young age and even though in the wild they are solitary creatures they become extremely friendly with enough human exposure

sometimes they dislike people for no apparent reason and will shoot water at them

they have three hearts 

each of their arms has a tiny brain that controls movement and sensory input on its own i shit you not

they are color blind and yet they can camouflage their color and nobody knows how 

they can change the color and texture of their skin faster than human eyes can keep up with it

great pacific octopuses are white when they are peaceful, and red when they’re excited 

aquarium octopus have escaped their tanks and slithered down pipes into the ocean 

escaped their tanks to eat the fish in other tanks 

escaped their tanks to go fight other octopuses cuz they were bored

octopus fight club

learned how to take photographs

cost thousands of dollars by flooding new floors

they can feel, taste, and smell with their suckers and all of their skin

they enjoy tasting their food by slowly moving it through their suckers instead of shoving it in their beaks

they can rewrite their rna. no, really

the only reason why they haven’t evolved to take over as the next dominant race is because they’re doing pretty well  in the ocean so there’s no need for them to adapt further 

there’s a ton more but i’m so overwhelmed by love i can’ think of any at the moment i’m going to cry

learned to shoot out the annoying light over the tank

hid in floor drains when caught out of their tanks by researchers

hid the shells of crabs stolen from a tank under a third, unrelated tank

- learned to spray 45°F water everywhere to demand splashes

-likes taking brushes from divers. Knows the best way to do this was to sneak up from underneath or reach over the shoulder

-will wait until keepers are looking away/distracted to grab stuff and knows exactly how far to sink down to get out of reach

-seriously octos are huge thieves. If you have something in your hand, they want it. As soon as they grab it, it belongs to them. There’s no food and they have no use for it? Doesn’t matter it’s their thing now.

-we lost a magnet scrubber for three days because one stole it from the interns. Every time she let it go and we reached a net to get it, she would snatch it out of the net and drag it back into the den. By the time we got it back she had torn apart the scrub pad

Cats, corvids, and octopi