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ive noticed u made the common mistake of stoppijg petting me so i will whine and paw ur paw until u realize this mistake its ok its a common mistake here let me lay on u to makr it easier

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

everytime this gets notes there's a chance i will see them while outside without sunscreen and go oh yeah. so ty for being part in my cancer prevention

If you’re pining you need to stop and pick a different tree. You know, spruce it up a little

I’m still proud of this post. It’s evergreen

what will it be, boss? the comfort of misery or the pain of change?

I tried distracting a vampire by throwing rice at him, but I only had two grains with me so it didn't work. He counted them instantly. Then he asked me what I was even doing with exactly two grains of rice, and I explained how a bowl of rice tastes better if you spread it out over an entire day. I asked him if he was gonna suck my blood but he said no, he just had a lot more questions about the rice thing.

How quickly we forget the dangerous crow boy who’s job it is to destroy plastic

Is that a miette?

Pride for you!  Pride for a thousand years!!

you COME OUT to miette? you come out to her as queer? oh! oh! pride for mother! pride for mother for One Thousand Years!!!!

I love how every June this one gets dug up and passed around again, lmao.

HAPPY LOS JIBBITIES EVERYBODY!!!

The time for Los Jibbities has arrived!

there are too many things happening this summer that i'm thinking we are going to need an extra 6-12 months of june and possibly another 3-4 months of july. probably no extra august as the problem should hopefully sort itself out by then. we are also looking into extending the day night cycle to 55 hours and extending the human lifespan to 10000 years.

“been softlaunching being a freak lately” amazing collection of words