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โ

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izzy's playlists!
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Today's Document
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Cosimo Galluzzi
we're not kids anymore.
cherry valley forever

Product Placement

pixel skylines
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
RMH
Aqua Utopia๏ฝๆตทใฎๅบใง่จๆถใ็ดกใ

romaโ
One Nice Bug Per Day
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@jamiemccrimmon
my bonnies

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Huang Yuxing aka ้ปๅฎๅ ด aka Yuxing Huang (Chinese, b. 1975, Beijing, China) - Sunrise and Sunset, 2013, Paintings: Oil on Canvas
Devastating to have more evidence that done IS better than perfect
Additionally, findings indicate that the act of doing shows you that you were not seeking perfection, you were fearing inadequacy
@grey-and-lavender
#oh that last line gutted me #is there a place between perfect and failure?
Good news! There is!
Bad news! It is called 'done'
โจ fuck โจ
My personal brand of humor is "horrible, useless advice delivered in an authoritative way" and this is the result of it
"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.
the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.
this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.
therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:
- being a cow
- being an almond
- being a woman
- being a coconut
- being in the omegaverse
- being an oat
(list is exemplary and not finite)
in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.
you shut your mouth.

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Translation: "Chancho! I'm leaving now dude, i'm leaving to go work now dude."
"If someone breaks in dude, you beat the ever-loving shit out of them real hard dude, you beat the shit out of them, Chancho, you hear me?"
"You just beat the shit out of anyone who breaks in!"
translation notes:
The dogs name is 'Chancho', a slang word for a pig. Basically, its like the dog is named 'piglet' ๐ฅบ
I fucking can't with his little face
You forgot to add the bodies of his victims in the background
queer muppet moments i would make happen if i was in charge of the muppets:
the electric mayhem (minus animal bcs hes their kid) arent a polycule, theyre monogamous. but specifically they break up and date each other one at a time. they have a chart.
animal is genderfluid. this is mentioned exactly once bcs kermit calls her he and she starts yelling "SHE/HER!" kermit corrects himself and the show goes on
rizzo made out with gonzo once but he still considers himself straight bcs gonzo is not a guy, he's a whatever. gonzo agrees with this
uncle deadly dated tim curry. it did not end well.
actual emotional scene of gonzo talking about how he feels abt gender. no jokes.
kermit: no matter what, gonzo is still gonzo, and we're always going to support gonzo no matter what gonzo decides- gonzo: kermit. i still use he/him
statler and waldorf wedding episode. theyre divorced by the next
beaker trying to ask bunsen out on a date. in the end it turns out bunsen thought they'd been dating for years.
miss piggy hanging out with drag queens
related, miss piggy starting to present butch and kermit being Really Into It. hes embarassed abt it
pepe begins a story with "when i was a little girl...."
janice decides to start using just she bcs "like, i could never be her"
rowlf mentions having a husband. even kermit is like "??? since when??!"
actually i change my mind. genderfluid animal is mentioned a second time when dr teeth is calling for instrument and mic checks, he turns to animal and yells "animal! pronoun check!" "HE/HIM" "alright!"
Swedish Chef neopronouns: bork/bork/bork

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Man notices an Eagle eyeing the fish he just caught
*gets back to the nest* baby you are NEVER gonna believe how i got this fish
u know when someone really annoying is talking and you can almost hear the XDDDDD in their voice
whatโs wrong with โxDโ?
not now quirkybrittany
my phone: *rings* me: absolutely not
you miss 100% of the shots you dont take๐ญ
"Lesbian welders, San Francisco", n.d. From the Visual Arts Legacy Collection (JSTOR)

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the libertarian fantasy of safety regulations existing due to sadistic enjoyment of government officials oppressing the innocent small business is kind of hilarious the more you think about it. I hope there is actually a guy out there who just fucking LOVES recalling unsafe food in a sicko sort of way. i'd respect him.
the art of having a regular conversation while you're falling apart inside