They model Gods after me

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

HIS TONGUE !!!!!!!!!

You only become conservative when the system works in your favour. That has not been the Millennial experience.

Lizzo is doing what Meghan Trainor thinks she’s doing

“What’s your spirit animal?” We’re white Rebecca we don’t have spirit animals ask me what my fursona is like you meant to ask u fucking coward

This is the funniest thing ive ever seen.

this is both very respectful and very cursed and honestly that’s an energy i wholeheartedly support

i audibly screamed

listen tiffany, i don’t know how to tell you this but your beautiful & tan/muscular instagram popping gay friend you keep trying to set me up w/ is single b/c he’s fucking like 8 different guys & doesn’t plan on stopping until he wakes up one morning & decides not to have sausage for breakfast & the only reason why he talks about being lonely & wanting to settle down when you guys have heart to heart wine conversations is b/c you’re forcing him to think about his life in the context of heterosexual monogamy when he’s a powerbottom polygamist, so unless you have another one who wants kids & a white picket fence in your back pocket then I can get my own dates sis

9-1-1 we have witnessed a murder

listen tiffany, i don’t know how to tell you this but your beautiful & tan/muscular instagram popping gay friend you keep trying to set me up w/ is single b/c he’s fucking like 8 different guys & doesn’t plan on stopping until he wakes up one morning & decides not to have sausage for breakfast & the only reason why he talks about being lonely & wanting to settle down when you guys have heart to heart wine conversations is b/c you’re forcing him to think about his life in the context of heterosexual monogamy when he’s a powerbottom polygamist, so unless you have another one who wants kids & a white picket fence in your back pocket then I can get my own dates sis

The ides of March is coming up what’s everyone getting me?

Seemlessness

If black cats could change into humans, I imagine this is what they’d be like.