Across the 'Verse

Asunder is basically the most classic way to be torn, and if you're looking to be cleft, in twain is a vintage but stunning choice

catholic guilt vs protestant belief in your own inherent superiority, fight

wait no I just remembered a few hundred years of history I take this post back

You know the problem with reading a book? You get hooked and then it ends and you feel sad

This post is cancelled, I have found a new book and everything is all right again

By Talos this cannot be happening

keep your head up, fellow wizard! it’s incantation, not incanttation!

wait

hold on

wait

It’s called ‘being able to see the corpse’

So if I put you in an L-shaped swimming pool, and you knew there was a corpse around the corner, you'd be fine?

loving the implication that I'm a little animal and you're a scientist putting me into various bodies of water to test my corpse:water ratio tolerance

[Image ID: Reddit post on r/ShowerThoughts from JollyTraveler reading: People will swim in the ocean, even thought there are definitely many corpses in it. People will not swim in a pool with a corpse in it. Humans all have a corpse:water ratio that is acceptable for them to swim in. /End ID]

It's spring now which means the kids in my city have started drawing hopscotches on the sidewalk and as a rule I do every hopscotch I see because 1. Use it or lose it (ability to scotch) and 2. If a child got down on the hardscrabble streets of Boston Massachusetts to draw a scotch the least I can do is use it, but in doing the hopscotches, I've learned that about 50% of them are the typical 8-10 step scotch and the other 50% are. Somewhat avant-garde. And of course I'm not vetting the entire scotch before I start it so sometimes it's like haha 8 steps woo! Childlike whimsy! And sometimes they're 20 steps or 30 or they've got a section with three squares instead of two where you have to do a little Charleston to step on all three, or, memorably, FORTY one foot squares. A full BLOCK of jumping on one foot but I'm no quitter so once I've started Jigsaw Junior's fuckin hopscotch gauntlet I'm there til the end just a daily pot smoker in her thirties jumping kasa-obake style through an affluent suburb while some little proto-kennedy watches from his bedroom window rubbing his sadistic little third grade hands together and cackling. It's amazing. I love spring.

gonna be honest i don’t know how many more ‘enter the 6 digit code we sent to your phone’s i got left in me

“It’s photoshopped” honestly in the age of AI that has a homey sort of nostalgia to it. Remember when people used to put effort into faking things?

oh gurl, you don't know the half of it. I remember 90s tabloid with headline my new neighbour is from Chernobyl and her baby has a tail! It was a poorly assembled collage of a baby's body with an ape's face and a lemur's tail all xeroxed into -100 contrast, people put effort of cutting clippings (granted with a rusty pair of scissors) but it counts

if christopher nolan was really the visionary and ground-breaking director everyone claims he is he would have cast ben affleck as penelope