Melo B.🥀 @tarcroach - Tumblr Blog

Sam Porter Bridges & Dollman in Death Stranding 2: On The Beach (2025).

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jerico3193

frizz01percy

this should be the most reblogged post on tumblr before it dies

xan-thos-blog

We need to reblog this so much that the post breaks

bittymoonbear-deactivated201807

Do not like

secret-unicorn-sierra-blog

Keep. Reblogging.

dawn-machine-official

If we reblog enough we could save it

vwidjojo

Reblogged at 1.7 M notes

weirdo09

reblogged at 1.8M notes

earhartsease

how did this lose over 5k notes

cybermax

I’m glad we cost Yahoo 2 billion dollars.

cybernetic-divinity-deactivated

it’s like a perfectly preserved body at Pompei

brothertedd-deactivated20240822

cheddar-baby

it is wild that the top post in #gay is a closeup shot of a hairy butt not marked sensitive but if a trans woman even says that shes a trans woman the post immediately gets blasted into the void by staff.

cheddar-baby

one of the top posts in #gay is an 8 second clip of a guy full on getting railed but you can't say that you're trans or else your tumblr gets wiped off the face of the earth. It truly was never about "adult content"

onceiwashere

hahahahaha dude this post mocking a random 1000-like tweet that calls sitting on the toilet backwards "fascist coded and kinda toxic" is so fucking funny it makes me want to reblog tumblr user hitlerismyactualboyfriend without looking

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tagzpite

Sheet done!!

Project Scorpion! Leon Design!

beardedmrbean

Man I wish my last name was Donderwinkel, everyone laughs till they hear what it means, they still laugh but also acknowledge that's pretty cool too.

libertarirynn-deactivated202006

riazendira

Here’s an oldie but a goodie: (please note, for best recommended results, try at liberal arts institutions known for being fans of theater)

As seniors, my friends and I greeted freshmen students (no one asked us to). One of us held a clip board and pen. One held a tailor’s measuring tape. And one had a sharpie and a small stack of “Hello my name is _______” name tags. Here’s how the prank goes.

1) Cheerfully greet each student as if you’re an official greeting team of some sort. Clip board holder says “Friend, let’s get you a name tag”

2) Measuring tape holder proceeds forward, holding out tape-measures something random about the person (something where you don’t actually need to be up close and personal, like the length of their shin from 2 feet away, or I suppose you could try asking “please may I measure your wrist” or some such). Measuring person calls out a number. Possibly two.

3) Clip board person studiously records the number on a chart. Nods gravely/excitedly/smoothly/suspiciously/enthusiastically/whatever at Name tag person.

4) Name tag person writes down something utterly totally random in the tag blank. Like “peanut butter” or “ aerodynamic jellyfish”. With great ceremony, tag person hands tag to new student. All prankers bow, or offer waves, while saying “Pleased to meet you (name tag name), welcome to college! We hope you have a great year!” And walk away in whatever style suits you best.

Done correctly, this can happen so fast and flawlessly that parents, new students and onlookers will all be awed and confused by the time you’re out of earshot and if they see you later, will simply go “hey, it’s the welcoming committee!” and laugh. And it’s so much fun.

sarahsupastar

I’m obsessed with the idea of doing this but ONE person just gets named Steve.

If their actual name is literally anything other than Steve, it’ll still be funny and everyone will wonder why this one person got a regular name on their nametag while everyone else is labeled as Jubilation or Injket-1098 or whatever.

If their actual name is really Steve, they will spend the rest of their life wondering how the hell you knew that by measuring the length of their pinkie.

riazendira

You. You get it. Carry on.

carnelianfoxx

when i was in 5th grade all of the girls in my class had webkinz and i thought they were really cool too so i asked my parents for one but they said no because it was a girls toy so i got a piece of paper and had a bunch of kids from different classes at lunch sign a petition demanding that i get a webkinz stuffed animal and my dad actually caved because he said he was super embarrassed and i was the proud owner of a husky

carnelianfoxx

I named him Carmel Apple despite the plushie looking nothing like a caramel apple

carnelianfoxx

hey everyone guess who!!!!!

deer-scribe

gangueiro

transviktortalis

#oh this place is HAUNTED haunted

alleiradayne

NOW it’s serious

appendingfic

This is the supernatural equivalent of going to the doctor and they keep pulling specialists in the room to go, “wow, I’ve never seen THAT before”

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ellis-deigh-blog

This guy raised an abandoned moose calf with his Horses, and believe it or not, he has trained it for lumber removal and other hauling tasks. Given the 2,000 pounds of robust muscle, and the splayed, grippy hooves, he claims it is the best work animal he has. He says the secret to keeping the moose around is a sweet salt lick, although, during the rut he disappears for a couple of weeks, but always comes home…. Impressive !! MINNESOTA CLYDESDALE

dreamofhircine

why are moose so terrifyingly large

totallynotagentphilcoulson

Because they’re pretty much legit surviving Ice Age megafauna and almost everything was bigger back then

henstomper

his moose leaves for a few weeks to Fuck

lyricwritesprose

And comes back because he figures he has a pretty sweet deal. Oats, salt, probably some treats and scratches, for the price of some basic pulling and advanced not murdering fools?

Sometimes I think people give themselves too much credit for animal domestication. Sometimes the main character of the domestication story is some terrifying beast who reasons, “But salt though.”

puncromancer

i get dicked down

puncromancer

but i get it up again

sango-blep

got some spare kisses for your thrush

batsandboba

o/ <- person waving

o7 <- person saluting

ol <- person raising hand

o1 <- person scratching head

\o> <- person stretching

chaos--themralds

\o/ <- woohoo!

the-text-party

<o> <- EXTREME STRESS, LIKE "OH FUCK OH SHIT" STRESS

mijomii

orz <- the person is on their hands and knees, on the floor, god what happened to them

OTL <- same, but we are now closer to them (mb softly pat their back or something)

brightsunnydaysofcastamere

or2 <- the person is still on their hands and knees but they've got a fat ass now

rapidhighway

OP2 <- still on their hands an knees but this time they've got a fat ass and great tits

thebibliosphere

Listen. I know it’s going to break everything but I need to see what my rainbow crabs look like.

thebibliosphere

Yeeeeeeessss

thebibliosphere

4 crabs can stay. As a little treat.

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