some falconer hcs we know next to nothing about them why not
tater is the only one who calls jack “zimmboni” on the regular, the rest of the guys make up random nicknames for him and change these like every day
the team favorite is definitely “zach jimmermann” which eventually gets shortened to “jimmy” and the media is just ?? ??? ??? ?
snowy’s list of weird goalie things is endless but the main one is he just. sings under his breath? even during games? according to him it helps him focus, and it does, but he also gets a sick satisfaction out of it when his quiet rendition of “the wheels on the bus” confuses and terrifies the other team’s forward so bad he misses the shot
calling marty jack’s dad bc they look Really Similar and they’re both from quebec... poots accidentally called marty jack’s dad in an interview bc they use that joke all the time in practice and he was hella embarrassed he got chirped about it for weeks
this devolves very quickly and marty absolutely loves it (jack thinks it’s funny but also he is so awkward please do not involve him in your wicked games you heathens)
marty: i’m gonna give that boyfriend of yours the shovel talk
jack: hey, marty? this is the nightmare scenario
rookie: marty’s a dilf
marty: what does that mean?
rookie, panicked: UH,, DAD I’D LIKE TO,, FRIEND,
other, more cursed rookie, under his breath: daddy
i mentioned snowy and poots living in the same apt in this post but i still love the idea of that and them being pretty close friends and it literally takes one (1) look from snowy for poots to dissolve into laughter they can’t sit together in practice they’re banned
thirdy and marty are Hot Dads and they know this and they love it; they both have twitters bc the pr people forced them to and all they post is hockey stuff, family stuff and dad memes. and retweeting each other; they have entire conversations in quote tweets and all their fans are just like “tEXT EACH OTHER JFC”
tater is? weirdly good at rubix cubes and other puzzles like that? he likes having something in his hands so he always has a puzzle thing with him but he’ll finish it in like less than 20 minutes so he just huffs and puts it back to its original position and starts again
he just generally loves puzzles and riddles he always has one in his head to ask people when he meets them for the first time and everyone is rly put off by it bc they’re like “hi nice to meet you-” and he just goes “WHAT IS HARDER TO CATCH THE FASTER YOU RUN??” & they’re like “um.. ok”
his metric for how cool people are is if they actually take time to think about the riddle. he thinks jack is really cool bc jack scrunched his face for like 2 minutes when asked & then shouted really loud and excited in the middle of a falcs pr function “YOUR BREATH!!!” and him and tater fist bumped. the beginning of a beautiful friendship
guy said he’d never read marty & thirdy’s retirement poems bc he’s secretly a p successful poet & has a couple books of poetry published under a pseudonym.. he’s a poetry snob
(“i bet they don’t even know what iambic pentameter is,” he mutters to his husband that night. “i know, babe,” his husband, who has had this conversation 300 times, replies.)