#simple question

Is mayonnaise an instrument? Is mayonnaise an instrument....

Well, let's find out....

Wikipedia states that anything used to create sounds musically can be considered an instrument!

Mayonnaise is known for its thick, gelatinous texture, but it transforms beautifully when spread on bread. However, instead of focusing on culinary uses, the topic at hand is explainin' how we can make sweet music with mayonnaise.

So let's say, for example, you have a slab of mayonnaise on a plate, lookin' gross n' shit. You have a spoon and lightly smack the top of the mayo slab with said spoon. What happens? It makes a sound. And sounds by themselves don't really make music. But if you make this sound with the intent to make music... it could possibly make somethin' happen. So, let's hit the slab in different spots with differing levels where you could theoretically make a song.

But here let me just grab an example of mayonnaise being used as an instrument. But where would you get an example of that, Father? And I hear your cries...

It's Spongebob. In Spongebob Squarepants season 2, episode 35, titled "Band Geeks," Squidward Tentacles tries to rally together a bunch of Bikini Bottom citizens to play at the upcomin' Bubble Bowl. During their rehearsal, Patrick Star asks Squidward Q. Tentacles, the conductor, asks a simple question. The same as yours; "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" And, of course, Conductor Tentacles responds with "No, Patrick. Mayonnaise is not an instrument..."

But you are WRONG Tentacles... and you've seen it yourself. Patrick Star plays mayonnaise at a concert in front of the Bikini Bottom public. Now bear witness to this...

Now Patrick here ops for a more... primitive approach of just shovin' your hand in the jar and movin' it around to create sounds.

But since a starfish could do it I could probably do it. So to answer your question, urigishi...