j𝔞𝔠k☕︎

I love looking at dogs

As soon as I start making good progress in the gym and locking into my hobbies……. here comes the job offer. Typical

Give me 50/50 odds and I’ll still fail twice

My new job offer has had me spending money I couldn’t even imagine spending before

I have 5 billion followers on tumblr btw…

Do yall need a lawyer? I currently work for 6 😎

Maybe it is better to speak than to die. But speaking may also lead to my death…

It’s funny because I’m at my job interview, and the lobby is playing saxophones, so the saxophones are literally getting louder

Gotta go back downtown in my stupid little suit again (I’m wearing my black suit this time—it’s kinda hot, actually)

You know, a bicep picture really is healing

*Me looking at the picture I took of my food after I’ve eaten it like it’s my dead wife*

Whenever someone asks me for directions in a place I’ve lived in all my life I feel like a pigeon in nyc who knows where everything is but just can’t verbalize it …

Any tips for interviewing at a law firm? I’m meeting with 4 of the partners on Monday