#queer parenting

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❓ FAQ

I keep seeing these end of the family tree gifs with the aromantic or asexual or aroace flag on them (no hate to the creator/creators doing this)

aromantic and asexual people can adopt or have kid’s biologically or both

People choose to have kids for many reasons

Aromantic or asexual people can choose to be single parents or raise kids with a friend or a partner

The True Adventures of Esther the Wonder Pig by Steve Jenkins – When Esther’s dads adopted her as a mini-pig, they didn’t realize she wouldn’t stay mini forever! As she gets too big for her bed and the tiny apartment the small family lives in, her doting dads make a big decision: they’re going to move to a big farm so Esther has enough room (and less chances of getting into trouble). Soon enough, their family begins to grow, as the farm becomes a sanctuary for all sorts of animals in need. Based on a true story.

Real Sisters Pretend by Megan Dowd Lambert – Mia and Tayja love to play pretend. But there’s one thing they know they don’t have to pretend about: they’re real sisters, even though they’re adopted.

Papa, Daddy, & Riley by Seamus Kirst – Riley loves her two dads, but when one of her classmates asks her which one is her real dad, she’s confused and a bit upset — she doesn’t want to have to choose, she loves them both!

A Plan for Pops by Heather Smith – Lou loves spending time with his granddad and Pops. But one day, Pops has a fall, and now he’ll have to use a wheelchair from now on. Pops isn’t taking the news too well, so Lou comes up with a plan to cheer him up. 

Old MacDonald Had a Baby by Emily Snape – Babies are a lot of work, and Old MacDonald has his hands full as a new father. Thank goodness he has his farm animal friends to help out (or try to)!

Team: Vancouver Goldeneyes (and Team Canada 2026)

Position: Goalie, #38

Nickname: Masch/Monster Masch

Relationship status: Married to Geneviève Lacasse

Masch has been in a relationship with her wife, Geneviève, since 2015 when the two both played as goalies for Team Canada. Geneviève has since retired from professional play, now working as a sponsorship & sales manager for the PWHL.

They got married in 2024, and the wedding was officiated by Montreal Victoire player and member of the infamous "Wife Line", Laura Stacey.

After getting married, they began a parenthood journey and Geneviève decided to carry their baby. He was born in 2024, and was named Beckham Brae Maschmeyer Lacasse. Masch posts adorable videos with the three of them all the time on Instagram!

‘Mama’ ehh, it works, but I feel too feminine.

‘Daddy’ he already calls his dad that, it’d confusing

‘Papa’ he calls his grandfather that, also confusing

Victor/Parent/God

Monster/Child/Humanity

in many cases, parents bring children into the world as a validation of the self more than a desire to create life. the life (with its infinite possibilities and infinite universes) created is largely immaterial to their desire to have children. the parent is not making the choice to take on the responsibility of those infinite possibilities - for better or worse.

Instead, the child is borne out of a desire to prove that they can. they can bring a child into the world and they can do better than their parents. their child will be smarter. their child will be stronger. their child will be healthier. their child will love, honor and respect them more than the parent ever did to their OWN parent because THEY will have earned it.

It correlates to the idea proposed by Friedrich Nietzsche in his Death of God theology

"God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?"

Victor performs for his father out of a desire to earn his father's respect. to avoid the (literal) pain and humiliation of being viewed as lacking by his father. this is not a loving relationship. This relationship is violently transactional, with Victor's father holding all of the currency.

Victor's father fails in saving his wife, Victor's mother. And in doing so, Victor loses respect for his father. His father is just a man. fallible, weak, imperfect, powerless. God is dead and Victor has killed him. And in one of their last momentous conversations Victor tells his father that he will surpass him. He will accomplish what his father could not. He intends to prove his worth by becoming God.

And so Victor creates. he becomes a parent in defiance of his failed predecessor. not once taking into consideration the responsibility in creating this life. not once accepting his own limitations or his own interests in investing the time and patience required in the shaping of this life. his interest started and ended at creation.

at no point did Victor think he was creating new life. in his mind he was owed a creature made in his image. Larger than life. Intelligent. Strong. Better. More powerful than his parts in every conceivable way. The Monster's naivety, ignorance, and individuality was a personal affront to Victor. How can he be God if his creation could be so infuriatingly lacking? How can he be God if he can't control The Monster's voice and thoughts?

bringing it back to the queer experience, many parents of queer children fail to love their children as they are because they never expected their child to BE their own person. they only ever prepared for the child to be an extension of them. a flattering, and adulating, mirror of themselves meant to carry on their torch, not light a new flame.

(note that Victor doesn't even have the patience to allow The Monster to look at his own appearance in a mirror and discover himself.)

now faced with a dilemma they never prepared for, these parents frequently choose forced conformity. SPEAK like ME. THINK like ME. BEHAVE like ME. LOVE like ME.

They push their children to fear them and hate themselves. To believe in their own wrongness. To see only broken pieces. To believe in the authority of their creator above all else. These are the children who are at highest risk for death by suicide. But, to the parent, death is an acceptable loss. They would rather love their child in a box than accept the child they can't understand.

And we see Victor do the same. He pushes and pushes and pushes until The Monster is in a corner and lashes back. Now Victor knows that The Monster could very well kill God and that cannot be allowed to happen. So Victor stages the ultimatum. One last chance.

Be like me. Think like me. Speak like me.

Conform.

One word. One last chance. Prove to me that you are worth my having granted you life. Be what I want you to be and nothing else.

But The Monster responds with the one word that proves that Victor is not his God and that The Monster is, in fact, his own person with his own uncontrollable soul.

"Elizabeth"

And so Victor leaves The Monster to burn in the flames of the torch that was supposed to be God's greatest triumph.

(and then we get this INCREDIBLE sequence in which The Monster goes through their own rebirth - shooting out of the tunnel/birth canal, towards life and landing in the waters below - a water birth or a baptism of his new life as his own person.)

and, yet, even through this new life, The Monster comes to learn that he isn't fully his own person. He never was. He was born wearing the scars of his father's sins. his body, his memories, his very heart are laden with the weight of the trauma and destruction that he inherited.

It is only through the love and compassion of Blind Man/Grandfather that he is able to accept the responsibility of the "original sin" he is burdened with and find purpose and acceptance as his own soul. Putting him on the path towards eventually forgiving his father without continuing the cycle of generational trauma.

The Monster forgives God and allows him to fade into powerlessness. God dies without being replaced. God is dead. I am not his. I am not broken. I am not wrong. I am me. And I am alive.

I'll end this with the poem I thought of the second the credits began to roll:

"They fuck you up, your mum and dad.

They may not mean to, but they do.

They fill you with the faults they had

And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn

By fools in old-style hats and coats,

Who half the time were soppy-stern

And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.

It deepens like a coastal shelf.

Get out as early as you can,

And don’t have any kids yourself."