#glowupmindset

There’s something people often misunderstand about femininity : they confuse softness with naivety. They assume that a woman who looks good, who dresses well, who takes care of herself must not be paying attention to the game around her.

But I am, I always am.

Because being pretty isn’t my only skill, it’s just the first thing you notice.

Behind the gloss, the glow, and the effortless presence, there’s calculation. There’s timing. There’s restraint. I know exactly when to speak, and when to let silence do the talking. I know when to charm, when to pull back, and when to let people underestimate me because there’s nothing more powerful than being misread and still coming out on top.

Pretty privilege doesn’t mean I didn’t earn my place. It doesn’t mean I float through life untouched. It means I’ve learned how to use every part of me. My words, my image, my intuition to move in silence and win in style.

You can call it manipulation if you want. I call it elegance. I call it discernment. I call it feminine intelligence.

And no, I don’t always explain what I’m doing. Because when you really know your power you don’t need to prove it.

jealousy as motivation + how to turn envy into your next glow-up

hi angel!! alright, let’s get real. feeling jealous sucks, especially when it’s toward someone you care about. it’s like this weird mix of guilt and frustration and just straight-up feeling not good enough. but guess what? jealousy is normal. like, completely human. it’s just your brain’s way of saying, “hey, i wanted that too.”

so instead of beating yourself up over it or trying to pretend it’s not there, let’s figure out how to use that energy for good. you don’t need to sit with that feeling forever. let’s take it and make it work for you.

✧˖° own your feelings

first things first: let yourself feel it. none of that “i shouldn’t feel this way” stuff. it’s okay. jealousy is just a reaction, not a reflection of who you are. acknowledge it. say it out loud if you have to: “i’m feeling jealous, and that’s okay.” you can’t move past something if you keep denying it.

𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕪’𝕤 𝕥𝕚𝕡:

try journaling it out. just grab a notebook (or open a doc) and write, “i feel jealous because...” and finish the sentence. let yourself get messy with it. write every little detail, why it bothers you, how it makes you feel, and what thoughts are running through your head. you might find that just writing it out makes it feel way less heavy.

✧˖° figure out the why

most of the time, jealousy isn’t really about the other person. it’s about something deeper. are you jealous of their scores because you feel like you didn’t try hard enough? are you upset because you actually did put in the effort, but didn’t see results? or maybe it’s about feeling overlooked. understanding the root makes it easier to address.

𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕪’𝕤 𝕥𝕚𝕡:

ask yourself these questions:

➼ is this jealousy actually about my own self-worth?

➼ am i comparing myself because i secretly don’t feel good enough?

➼ is there something i admire about how they study or prepare that i could learn from?

sometimes the jealousy is just your brain’s way of saying, “i want to do better too.” and that’s okay. that means you’re motivated, you just need to channel it the right way.

✧˖° reframe the jealousy

okay, so we’ve faced it. now let’s flip it. instead of seeing your friend’s success as a threat or a reminder of what you didn’t do, look at it as proof that it’s possible. they did it, which means it’s not out of reach for you either. that’s actually kinda amazing if you think about it. it’s like the universe giving you a little nudge that, “hey, you can get there too.”

𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕪’𝕤 𝕥𝕚𝕡:

try saying this out loud: “their success does not take away from mine.” repeat it until it feels real. just because someone else did well doesn’t mean you can’t too. there’s enough room for both of you to thrive.

✧˖° turn jealousy into inspiration

now we’re getting to the fun part. use that feeling as fuel. instead of just sitting with it, let it push you forward. break it down: what did your friend do differently? did they study in a way you haven’t tried yet? did they stick to a schedule? maybe they just had a really good mindset going into the test.

make a list of things they did that you think helped. then, figure out which of those things you could realistically try for yourself.

𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕪’𝕤 𝕥𝕚𝕡:

ask your friend for tips. seriously. it can feel awkward, but most people love to share what worked for them. just be honest: “hey, i really admire how well you did on that test. i’ve been struggling a bit, do you have any tips or study methods that helped you?” you’ll get insights and might even strengthen your friendship.

✧˖° set your own goals

this is key. you’re not trying to “beat” your friend. you’re just trying to do better for yourself. so set a goal that’s yours alone, something that doesn’t depend on how someone else is doing. it could be something like:

➼ “i want to improve my math grade by 10% on the next test.”

➼ “i’m going to study for 30 minutes every day after school.”

➼ “i’m going to do one practice paper a week.”

make it specific and achievable. that way, your focus shifts from “i need to beat them” to “i need to be proud of myself.”

✧˖° practice gratitude (yes, even for them)

it sounds weird, but it works. next time you’re around your friend or thinking about their success, say (out loud or in your head), “i’m happy for them.” at first, it might feel forced. but after a while, you’ll notice it makes you feel lighter. gratitude has a way of pushing out the bitterness.

𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕪’𝕤 𝕥𝕚𝕡:

practice being your own hype woman too. list three things you’re proud of, big or small. remind yourself that you have your own strengths, even if they’re not the same as your friend’s.

✧˖° focus on progress, not perfection

the goal here isn’t to suddenly be completely unbothered by your friend’s achievements. it’s okay if it still stings a little. the goal is to not let that feeling stop you from going after what you want.

jealousy is just a reaction. it’s what you do with it that counts. use it to get curious about your own habits, find inspiration in their success, and set your own goals. you’ve got this, babe. i believe in you.

💌 let me know how it goes!! i’m rooting for you!

you’re allowed to feel what you feel, and you’re allowed to grow from it. rooting for you always 💕

xoxo mindy

I'm going to say something that might break your current system:

Everything you're doing to get there is keeping you from arriving.

1. I stopped trying. And that's when it started working.

There's a version of "doing the work" that is secretly just panic in a pretty outfit.

Checking the mirror forty times a day isn't faith — it's auditing. Stacking subliminal on top of subliminal isn't trust — it's desperation with headphones in. Finding the next thing to fix isn't growth — it's your mind convincing you that you're not done yet. That you're not there yet.

And as long as you believe you're not there yet — you won't be.

The shift happened when I told myself one simple thing: there is nothing to fix. Not because I'd arrived. But because arriving was already inevitable. It was already decided. So the checking, the obsessing, the rituals — they became pointless. Not because I gave up. Because I was done. There's a difference.

2. I stopped dressing like someone who was waiting to become her.

I sat with myself and asked a question I hadn't asked before:

What does the version of me who already has this actually do on a Tuesday?

She doesn't count calories — she just eats well because that's who she is. She doesn't wear clothes that hide her — she wears what she loves because she's not waiting for permission from the mirror first.

So I stopped waiting.

I ordered the yogurt bowl. I wore the dress. I showed up as her before I felt like her — because I understood that the feeling follows the identity, not the other way around.

Was it uncomfortable? Genuinely, yes. There were moments I felt like I was wearing a costume. But underneath the discomfort was something quieter and more certain — the feeling of actually moving. Of becoming. Not performing becoming. Actually becoming.

That feeling is unlike anything else.

3. I didn't push harder. I just didn't quit.

Persistence, the way most people practice it, looks like force. More affirmations. Louder. Longer. More convinced.

But real persistence is almost boring. It's just — not letting the doubt win. Not engaging with it. Not arguing with it, not feeding it, not trying to logic your way out of it.

A contradicting thought would come. I'd see it. And I'd let it pass like a car outside a window — present for a second, then gone. I wasn't beautiful because I convinced myself. I was beautiful because I decided I already was, and I simply didn't renegotiate that decision every time my reflection had an opinion.

That's it. That's the whole thing.

You're not behind because you're not trying hard enough.

You're behind because you're trying at all.

Decide. Occupy. Persist without force.

Love me like it hurts.