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Look, this is something I'm extremely passionate about, so indulge me for a minute and let me tell you how this should have been done.
The RIGHT way to do this would have been to have a month-long event that went to twelve different cities, with Philadelphia hosting during July because that was our capital (insofar as we had one) in 1776; the other eleven stops could have their own significant-in-the-Revolution days (for example: Washington crossing the Delaware on 25 December, the start of the First Continental Congress on 5 September), and you could get commemorative items from your stop's specific event.
All fifty states AND FIVE TERRITORIES should have been invited to attend, not charged for it. And we should have done it Colombian Expo style: respected thinkers and educators speaking, concerts, "come look at our wild new inventions," and cultural events. If I was in the Oval Office my first thought for this would be to contact ethnic leaders to see who wanted to tell their story. Tribal leaders. Civil rights leaders. Local arts groups. Let us celebrate your food, your art, your dance, your place among our people; and let us also recognize that the flip side of the coin of amazing inventors and economic prosperity on a global scale has been devastation and exploitation. You can't tell the story without both. It's not fair to leave out things we've done for good (Mark Twain! Jonas Salk! Airplanes! Comic books! Musicals!), but it's equally unfair to leave out the lives we've taken and futures we've destroyed. We can't do better if we don't look at these things and say "no. Not again. Not on our watch."
The state fair format is extremely American; I think that was a good choice, I'll give credit for that where it's due. But "that was a good idea" is as far as it goes. Because this doesn't look like a state fair. It looks like a church revival on the third day when all the tents are out of food and everyone is hot and tired and wants less Jesus and more air conditioning.
It could have been so good. My only hope is that we have a Democratic president in 2037, and that they take the opportunity for a Constitutional Celebration Year (it'll be the 250th for the Constitution that year, and ours is the oldest constitution in continuous use in the world), and do it right.
That would be a very cool format! I would suggest that, instead of all 12 locations being significant to the revolution, they be aignificant to US in general. (montgomery alabama, for wxample).
That would allow for a greater location spread. More expensive to move, but would allow people across the country an easier/less expensive travel to get there.
No, no, I mean every location would have a significant date they could build their experience around. It wouldn't be "well, sorry, Seattle, but you're getting June, not July, so no big holiday for you." It'd be "hey Seattle, you're in June! That's Washington taking the army and the Battle of Breed's Bunker Hill!" Then Seattle could choose to, say...have an image of Washington inspecting his troops as their "and on our commemorative STUFF we have...." image.
Otherwise everything would be in Boston, New York, and Philly. That ain't gonna work. The Big Day should be in Philly, tho.
As someone who remembers 1976, the Bicentennial, this is all very pathetic.
In 1976, the Bicentennial was everywhere. There was merch. You could decorate your home with it. In the city where I lived, the Girl Scouts were asked by the city to go around painting all the fire hydrants red, white, and blue. American history was the hot topic in publishing and people were buying history books and even talking about them. One of the TV stations used commercial breaks to air "Bicentennial Minutes," 60-second spots in which actors from current shows (I specifically remember Loretta Swit from MASH and Nancy Walker from Rhoda) told us little snippets of social history, like the state of garbage collection in the Colonies, with appropriate visuals like political cartoons and paintings from the time period. High school proms had Bicentennial themes. You never saw so many people put flags out. Every town worked hard on their firework displays and some had more than one.
Yeah, we all knew it was overblown and a bit tacky but also people were into it. The energy rose for months to the climax and lingered into the next school year -- I remember all my pocket folders for that year were glossy prints of classic patriotic paintings, The Spirit of '76 and The Declaration of Independence and so on.
For the 250th, nobody cares. Because it doesn't feel like we're living in the United States of America, where freedom was for everyone and our freedoms were expanding every day and history was a vital living force.
You can't celebrate history without teaching it.
You can't expect people to celebrate freedom when we're losing it.
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AO3 does not live in āthe cloudā because that is other peopleās computers, and other peopleās computers are vulnerable to censorship.
AO3 is on its own computers. It does still have to be housed somewhere, and I suppose a determined enough hater could try to find that place and go after it, but itās a lot harder than sending spurious complaints to Amazon or whomever going āBadWrong things are hosted on your cloud service!ā
When people involved with AO3 talk about āthe cost of serversā they donāt mean āthe cost to pay Amazon for space on their servers.ā They mean, like, the cost to physically own them, and eventually replace them with new ones. And the operating costs to run them.
AO3 is not āin the cloud.ā AO3 is stored on physical machines that the OTW owns.
While this is not a solution that can work for everyone who wants to deal with controversial content, it is why AO3ple sneer at alt-righters who complain about getting thrown off hosting platforms.
BecauseĀ I want us to own the goddamned servers, ok? Because I want a place where we canāt beĀ TOSedĀ and where no one can turn the lights off or try to dictate to us what kind of stories we can tell each other.
AO3 was established because of fic being thrown off website hosts, fic being censored and/removed, and fic writers and archivists being sued by IP owners and authors.
The only way AO3 could ever exist without those daily threats is by owning their own servers and domain (and awesome lawyers and everyone else involved).
That is why there are no ads. That is why it is (typically) stable. That is why there are strict tagging rules.
We Can Actually Have Nice Things.
They set out to ensure we could for future generations, and past generations and current generations. They are fighting the good fight, so you donāt have to.
The Organization for Transformative Works (who created AO3) are an actual non-profit organization, not a company.
itās infuriating when the customer is wrong yes we all know this. however itās probably 10000x worse when the customer is right, because what do you MEAN my coworker deleted 7 of your fucking accounts off of your profile when you just wanted to edit them and now I have to deal with it??? i canāt even be pissed that youāre being a bitch about it because i would be too!!! fuck!!!!
1) take a deep, irritated breath and go "oh" in a voice of sudden, ground-down revelation. Let the customer hear you.
2) "you're right. I see what they did. That is...okay. I don't know why they did this. Let me straighten it out. I'm so sorry." <- do this in a tone that makes it clear Your Coworker Is A Moron. Now it's not you versus the customer, it's You And The Customer Versus This Dumbassery.
It won't make the rest of the job any easier, but it should defuse the customer.
so when i was a kid a read this story where a boy gets turned into a mouse by evil witches. at the end (spoilers) him and his beloved grandmother manage to slaughter all the witches but they do NOT manage to turn him back to a human child. he stays a mouse. the grandmother rebuilds her home to be mouse accessible. and they discuss the fact that he's aging like a mouse, so he probably only has a few years to live; but it's ok, because the grandmother confesses that she ALSO only has a few years to live and they both agree that they wouldn't want to live without the other. So everything is alright then, and they're happy, and that's the end of the story. it's probably been over two decades since i read it and quite frankly i am still processing the intertwining concepts of love and mortality but anyway that's not my point. my point is that Rocky did not die of acute radiation sickness because he spent enough time shielded by astrophage that his body was able to handle the damage, but holy shit does he have every type of cancer. he didn't die entering grace's atmosphere but all of his organs caught fire. I repeat ā his internal organs caught fire. he spent several decades in a low gravity environment. Do you know what human bodies do in low gravity? it's not good man. 20% muscle loss in two weeks. 1% bone density loss every month. Maybe carapaces and low organic matter would handle the change better, but idk, it might actually be worse.
anyway my point is, actually, i do think that Rocky and Grace would get to grow old together.
i know i'm op but op the idea of Grace arriving at Erid on the verge of death, recovering, and then living a long and full (maybe not especially healthy) life, vs Rocky arriving home a trimphant hero, a miraculous survivor of a thousand calamaties only to at long last have to pay the toll, dying tragically young, I'm.
Rocky and Grace jokingly comparing the pros and cons of bipedal vs pentapedal joint pain. Rocky wearing the xenonite exo-suit because it actually helps keep his carapace from collapsing to the ground. Grace affectionately bumping his cane against it in morse code because of course their stupid ernglish pidgin isn't enough; now that everyone know english they also need a secret language that's just for them.
Grace in his motorized bubble scooter touring the city. Naturally, Rocky's going to keep him company by riding in the stupid sidecar, how would he explain everything if he was walking beside him? And of course Rocky's telling people to repeat things and his voice is weirdly pitchy, Grace is there and human hearing is awful. It would be rude to talk normally.
Rocky pulling out the old hamster ball and curling up inside. And he knows, he knows its bad posture, but right now it hurts less. Grace curled up around him, the exterior of the ball a carefully calibrated 39 C. They are both hiding from well meaning physical therapists. Whispering doesn't actually do anything in that regard, but Rocky finds whispering hilarious for some reason (Eridian equiv of helium infused squeaky voice).
Gravity as Erid's love for them, a painful embrace they wouldn't trade for anything.
They get to grow old together. It's not enough time, but its so much more than they thought they would have; it's surprisingly easy to be okay with it. It's a tragedy from every angle except perhaps the inside.
#whatever you do don't think about adrien ok#adrien got him back. They got to see him again. There's 23 other mates who can't say the same#i think there's a world with pebbles and an affectionate blobby uncle#but in this one the infertility is the first warning that he's maybe not okay#(of course rocky avoided mentioning the chronic pain - he'd been living with most of it for decades at this point)#(and for the first year or 2 he's dead serious about getting Every doctor to work on Grace. Like at first you think hes being hyperbolic#But theres a solid period where rocky is genuinely indignant at the concept of any doctor anywhere working on someone who isn't grace#Yes he knows other people need doctors too.#but also did you consider that they can fucking wait question???)#Anyway#In the end#In the end rocky falls asleep with grace watching. a few hours go by. and then a few more.#and then grace figures rocky won't mind if he rests his eyes for just a minute.#and neither of them have to mourn.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Huzzah! I am here to provide a fic for Invisobang 2023!
This is a crossover between The Martian and Danny Phantom. You do NOT need to have read or watched The Martian to understand this fic (though, I recommend it because it's amazing!)
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Summary: When Astronaut Mark Watney went to Mars, he knew there was a chance he'd never come home. Now, though, he's determined to last long enough for NASA to save him because this wholeĀ dying for scienceĀ thing is not as fun as it sounds.
Meanwhile, Danny Fenton is just trying to keep his identity a secret amidst a potential crisis with his powers. Seriously, what's up with that weird current under his skin? Why is he having so much trouble controlling it? And why does it feel so familiar...?
In a fit of determination (and possible stupidity), Danny goes to Mars to save Watney, only to add to both their crises when he arrives and can't get home. Will NASA save them? Will Danny have a home to return to if they do?
Chapter WC: 6,186
Fic Tags: Danny Fenton & Mark Watney, Canon Divergence, Ecton AU
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I am going to be updating a chapter each day of this posting week, and then I'll settle into a normal weekly/biweekly posting schedule.
I go into more detailed thank yous on AO3, but quickly I'd like to extend a hugeeeee thank you to @armed-with-knitting-needles, @bibliophilea, @lexiepiper, and @underforeversgrace for aiding in this fic. Between sitting on discord with me for hours doing math, betaing my infamous spelling habits, and in general providing much needed support in the form of memes, graphs, and good humor, these people are all AMAZING and I am forever in all of your debts š
Since I'm not posting the chapters themselves on Tumblr, I pu preview excerpt under the cut! Enjoy!
It had been a day since the news about the disastrous Mars mission was released.
NASA's website where satellite images of the Ares 3 camp were published had gotten so much traffic that the server went down for twelve hours.
Everyone wanted to see it. The wind storm. The camp in ruins.Ā
The aftermath.
Of course, NASA wasn't pointing their satellites at Ares 3 anymore. There was no reason to now that the surviving five crew members were well on their way back to Earth in theĀ HermesĀ .Ā
God, what Danny would give to see the inside of that ship. If it was on Earth, the temptation to fly down to Cape Canaveral and invisibly peek inside would have easily won him over. But unfortunately, theĀ HermesĀ has never been to Earth. It wasn't powered by regular rocket fuel, it was powered by ion enginesĀ āĀ whatever that meant.Ā
All Danny knew was that theĀ HermesĀ needed to be assembledĀ in spaceĀ instead of on Earth. It was shipped up chunk by chunk to the International Space Station where it was put together in orbit.
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the thing about that weird stuff americans call cheese is that if you heat it a little it becomes an excellent burger condiment despite its failings in every other area. such is the fate of the american cultural product
the American 'cheese' slice was engineered by our best scientific minds (all borrowed from Germany ofc) to melt perfectly onto a burger and for nothing else. Its only purpose is to compliment the one true product of the American people. The hamburger. (also borrowed from Germany)
American Cheese is a processed cheese made of Cheddar, Colby, or similar, combined with Sodium citrate. The Sodium citrate keeps the cheese fats from separating during the pasteurization process.
The patent for processing American Cheese was granted in 1916 to James L. Kraft, a Canadian of German descent who had immigrated to the US in 1904. Pasteurizing the cheese prevents it from spoiling, allowing it to be shipped farther and stored longer. It was actually WW1 that gave Kraft (and his company) their big break, as the US government provided cheese (in tins) to the armed forces abroad.
So no, Project Paperclip here, although the US Armed Forces and Germans were involved. His ancestors left Germany for Mennonite reasons, not because they were Nazis.
Fun fact: His parents spelled their last name "Krafft". He dropped one of the Fs when he started J.L. Kraft & Bros. Company, which later became Kraft Foods.
Fun fact: pasteurization aside, you can get some sodium citrate and do the same trick with basically any cheese. Want sliceable, meltable gorgonzola? Perfect burger-topping gruyere? Smooth pourable mimolette? All possible!
Thereās an episode of Sesame Street (on Netflix! you can watch it easily!) where Elmo attends a toy-swap, where you offer up old toys you donāt play with anymore and receive someone elseās toys that are new to you. Cute!
But Elmo, after cheerfully surrendering his old toys, sees that the children who swapped toys with him are playing with his toys āwrongā! Theyāre imagining entirely different make believe scenarios! Theyāre pretending the football is a dinosaur egg instead of a rocket ship! Aaahhhhh!!!! And this is so distressing to poor Elmo that he does the unthinkable: He does swapsies-backsies and takes all his toys back!
This being Sesame Street, he learns that you canāt control how other people play pretend, but you can join in if you want to! And if you donāt want to, thatās ok, you can just play pretend your own way by yourself or with someone else who wants to play that way too. You can still be friends with people who play pretend differently than you (and arenāt being mean/harmful/etc, do not bad-faith-read this š¤Ø).
