i’ve truly never been happy enough at any point in my life to justify the amount of nostalgia that wrecks me daily

finding a new doctor. applying for jobs. searching for apartments. messaging used car dealers. getting your health insurance to do their job. getting a pharmacy to do their job. getting the dmv to accept the documents they told you to bring. just listing things they probably make you do in hell

shout out to I will follow you into the dark for being the song of all time. death cab for cutie just nailed it. there's never been a song as much as I will follow you into the dark. it's so song. like?? hello?? if heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied, illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs, if there's no one beside you when your soul embarks, I will follow you into the dark. that's all there is to it.

oh i’m sorry would you rather me beat an alive horse?

basically i'm a late in life life-enjoyer so if it seems like i approach all the recent situations i get into like i'm new on earth that's why

normalize flopping. it’s ok to fail baby. sexy even

the amount of people saying "i thought you meant flopping on the ground". target audience

normalize flopping. it's ok to flail baby. sexy even

i need to change my whole life in one day. watch out world. i'm about to rearrange my furniture and cut my hair and develop new yet fully formed healthy habits all in the span of 24 glorious hours. i will also be buying groceries.

they love me because I be saying shit like alas and perchance

last night I said 'how fortuitous' unironically

girl nothing is ever gonna be all the way together just enjoy the bits and pieces #yourfragments

Used to be able to have fun on the internet now all the websites are after my identity like the devil is after my soul

where's that post about how when you're hungover you start talking to yourself like a mayor might address the town after a natural disaster. "we will rebuild" and so on