Memories of a Succubus

NEEDLE FELTING?????

my wife tried to do the thing where you pull a tablecloth really fast and the dishes stay in place but instead of a tablecloth it was a towel and instead of dishes it was our poor long suffering cat that was just trying to sleep on said towel. poor baby got whipped across the room fast enough that its meow got dopplered into meeeeeeOOOWWwwwwww

Every night i scroll for hours, waiting for the post that sends me into hysterics so i may fall asleep. thank you, goodnight

(wakes up in a cold sweat) ga, ga, goncharov, member of the russian mob

"Your case looks like a 45-minute episode. We're in for an 8-hour Scandinavian miniseries."

I love the very idea of the paris catacombs like. yeah sure the real-life city of paris has a straight-up megadungeon sprawling under it. Why not.

There’s also bones.

“Well how much bones.” I can assure you a comical amount. You’d think I was joking amount. Dark Souls ass decoration amount

the way trump is talking abt hillary makes him sound like a scorned lover lmao what if monica wasn’t bill’s only side bitch??

you gotta be fucking kidding me

Jacob Elordi carrying Mia Goth in that dress down the set of 200 stairs blows my mind every time I see this screen cap

ive recently been able to get over my sensory issues regarding moisturizer by literally just saying "im going snail mode"

i would 100% believe you if you told me this was based on a true story