What, You Knave!

lost all my bart coin nedless to say im gonna marge into oncoming traffic

im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

website called http://whenwillmydogdie.com where you put in a picture of your dog, the dog's age, and location, and then the website does a bunch of fake calculations before presenting you with a one hour countdown

the bus is never going to come because im a bad person

I’ve seen you people thirst after men I wouldn’t even feed to my creature

"this game BROKE me" gets thrown around as clickbait a good bit, but I gave borderlands 3 a try and at one point early on a character went off on an unfunny standup rant that lasted just long enough that I felt something snap and just closed the game and never opened it again

A pet peeve of mine is when people don't understand the difference between millipedes and centipedes