gay guys R us

staring at the dessert menu and twirling my hair and going "should I be baaaaddd" until the autistic girl I'm eating with says "there is nothing bad about eating dessert. it is a morally neutral action"

billions and billions of WASTED taxpayers money

Not to mention all the dead and maimed-for-life service personel.

two prime examples of why people hate americans 👍

saw someone including "Mandate of Heaven" as one of those christian terms tumblr likes to use to sound profound. which i get where you're coming from but t☝️hat one is chinese

man with loophole fetish facing criminal charges gets off on a technicality

How's the dental?

you can have all the teeth you can carry

the thing is they really do let you hit because you're goofy.

i say shit like "whuh oh!" and it makes girls want to kiss me under moonlight for some reason

it’s soso cool how mental health meds can lower your heat tolerance severely and make you sweat buckets. Love this feature

fellatio sounds like a supporting shakespeare character rather than oral sex on a penis to be honest

revealing your scaring the hoes type interests early on in a relationship is a good way to secure only hoes of bravery and fortitude that will craft horrible dreams and beautiful nightmares with you