I'm simply aces!

Reblog or your mom will die in 928 seconds.

omg im so glad to se so many people love their mummy

Why’re you being mean to my mum?

goddamn it

Nope. Googled it. 15 minuets. Nope. Not taking any chances

Koop

This has 1.2 million reblogs … Ps not riskin it

1.4 almost ps not risking it

Fuck this post

I am sorry…

I fucks with my moms too heavy to be playing games. REBLOG

Hell no.

No chances 😂😩

Can’t take no chances!

Darn shame if this circulated…

Extremely unfortunate we wouldn’t want that to happen

today my dad wore a tie-dye shirt i made for him to the hospital where he works. apparently at one point he walked into the break room after seeing a patient and everyone there kinda… just started staring at him. so he got confused and was like “what is it??” and one of his coworkers asked “…is that blood?” and then my dad finally looked down and realized the collar of his shirt was visible though the scrubs, so everyone could see this vivid red splatter right near his neck. with no context whatsoever. in a hospital.

This reads like a post with 10k notes

with you help it can be

There is no way this is a porno

This is the best porno there has ever been.

The way he says “HEY WHAT THE FUCK” shaped me as a person

When I grow up I wanna be upper middle class.

I want like… a condo. And enough money to go on vacation sometimes. And maybe a mug.

Maybe I’m tired of going to thrift stores for mugs. Maybe I’m tired of the $5 target mugs. Maybe I want a really nice mug. Not like five hundred nice mugs. Just like… one or two would be nice. You know? Maybe I’d hang one on my wall. I think I’d like that. Owning a wall.

Again, people are misunderstanding my actual desires represented by the mug.

Every time we go into a Big Fancy Houseware shop just to browse, I stare wistful at the mugs. “We have enough mugs” I will say. But I know I my heart that all the mugs at home are mismatched and old, or secret Santa gifts from across the years. None of them have been purchased solely for the joy of buying a fancy new mug.

I made this post over a year ago now and inevitably whenever it gains more traction someone will pop up completely misunderstanding me, not understanding that I’d just like to be comfortable. I don’t actually want advice on how to acquire mugs. I own a couple of mugs. I’d just like to be able to have some security. Maybe a pool. Maybe I’d like to own a small amount of property. A condo, maybe. I’d like to be able to travel. You’ll notice that nobody here is giving advice on how to acquire a condo or a vacation. They’re just taking the mug part seriously. All I wanted to do was fantasize about a world where I don’t live in a studio apartment that takes up half of my paycheck in rent alone and maybe I have a stupid white dad device mounted on the wall to showcase my mug collection. Can everyone just shut the hell up about telling me how to acquire mugs? I don’t care about the traps of consumerism! I just wanna be able to afford to visit my aunts sometimes! And so what if I do want an expensive mug? That’s my goddamn business.

This is a perfect summary of what it’s like for try to communicate any idea that can’t fit neatly into a single sentence on Tumblr Dot Com.

Those “curtains were just blue” memes did irreparable damage to society.

reblog to give a strawberry to the person you reblogged this from

Reblogging this on ALL my blogs because holy shit is it useful

reblog to reblog from the person you reblogged from

Man, this is like the time my therapist explained that watching characters with "chemistry" is supposed to make you feel aroused. Who knew, right?

I'm sorry what?

I thought it was supposed to make you intrigued like any other plot device

Just got fired for closing 10min early last night LOL ok I’m killing myself FOR REAL now

Still rlly need help lol

This is so wonderful!

ACE VALIDATION BABEY

They say “bros before hoes” but neglect to mention that the bros are the hoes

me and the boytoys

Yeah I’ll reblog that

Oh shijj!

[id: three illustrations. the first is of a fat woman with freckled light brown skin and blonde hair in a ponytail sitting on an undefined surface with her hands at her sides. she’s wearing a short teal dress with a heart neckline and looking up to the side with a smile. the second is darkly-lit and of two women surrounded by faintly glowing yellow orbs. a fat woman with brown skin and long dark brown hair wearing a floral pink crop top and high-waisted denim shorts stands in front, arms resting at her sides. behind her stands a chubby black woman with dark brown skin and pink hair in a shoulder-length afro wearing a yellow cold-shoulders dress. she’s looking forward with a blush and smile, hands resting on the other woman’s upper arms. the third is of two fat women against a white background with a pink heart behind them. the first has light skin and curly black hair. the other is black with dark skin and short curly black hair. they’re both wearing white wedding dresses and veils. the first is holding a bouquet of yellow flowers while the second has yellow flowers tucked into her hair. /end id.]

ive worn heart shaped glasses for almost 4 years and they are just like my Thing and i love them so much and so often people will say shit like Oh Id Love To Wear Something Like That But I Could Never Pull It Off and like... babe no one can theyre heart shaped glasses u dont wear them to look flattering or stylish or whatever u wear them to make ur soul happy

stop worrying about whether u look Nice and start worrying about whether u look like You

i didnt articulate it well so i just wanna clarify. the point of this post was not "fuck the haters wear what you want" it was "fuck the idea that clothes and accessories exist to make you look good they should exist to make you happy"