Soulless Employee

Italians, huh? Maybe we're not so different after all. .

It's extremely funny that there have been multiple writers in multiple mediums who've been allowed to write Wolverine from the X-men who clearly had no idea what a wolverine is and assumed it was a fancy word for "wolf", and at no point did any of the literally dozens of other people involved in bringing their writing to life see fit to challenge this assumption.

see when people try and nitpick me because i call my dog "my dog" when it's technically "the family dog".......well first of all i still call my brother "my brother" and not "the family boy". although maybe that should change. second of all sorry i'm still thinking about the family boy. btw i fell asleep while making this post last night and i think you can tell

Mistook the couch as your palm and thought this was the tiniest sweater in the world

sideways

take a look 👆 you just might feel something incredible

ON THE SHOW "SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS," THE KRABBY PATTIES THE TITULAR SPONGEBOB MAKES PROFESSIONALLY ARE, PER THE SERIES CREATOR, VEGETARIAN. THIS IS BECAUSE NICKELODEON HAD RULES FOR THE SPONGEBOB PRODUCTION TEAM AGAINST DEPICTING FISH AS FOOD FOR OTHER FISH. SOMETIMES THEY BROKE THIS RULE

I'm so fucking normal that regular expressions are just expressions to me

I just call them vectors

There is not even time for a quick jerk off

I wish all the pee came out in one go like a shotgun blast

you just dont get this on other websites

hey patrick can you see my feet

Yeah spongebob look at mine I’m facing the toilet

Patrick we have penises and were peeing with them

Excuse me ladies, everything you’ve just said about being spongbeob and Patrick and having penises you pee pee with has been echoed and amplified down the hall, were we are holding a Sunday school class. We all have heard what you’ve said about peeing towards the toilet with your penises, and I am just letting you know.