lesbian gregory house

just finished no reason (2x24) in my house rewatch and. it’s actually fucking incomprehensible how much gregory house loves lisa cuddy. the fact that this episode is the first to mark his many hallucinations — and he outright asks one of the biggest questions of the entire show, “how do you know what’s real?” — sets a precedent for his subconscious feelings toward cuddy. from the moment he first ‘wakes up’ in his hallucination the camera is focused on his patient wristband with cuddy’s name printed on it in clear view, so it’s assumed she’s his attending (just as she’d been in “three stories” (1x21)). as the episode goes on, house soon realizes that cuddy was the one to suggest treating him with ketamine, which he attributes to simultaneously healing his leg and damaging his brain. and this is the ongoing personal struggle for house — the battle between the mind and body / thoughts and feelings / the abstract and concrete. and, as moriarty points out, how house determines and appraises the all important “truth.” so cuddy, in house’s subconscious, represents both his struggle and his salvation. enraged, scared, and hurt by her decision, house accuses cuddy of messing with his mind, something he has always kept in pride of place (compare & contrast with the scene in recession proof (7x14) where house tells cuddy that loving her makes him a worse doctor but that this is worth it to him). cuddy and wilson, however, point out that their intentions were good, an argument that comes full circle when moriarty challenges house’s belief about “measurable truths” by insisting that “good intentions” and “what’s in your heart” also matter. it’s in this moment that house understands he’s been seeing moriarty’s late wife, and is inspired to apologize for telling her a “measurable truth” that only led her to suicide. ultimately, it’s seeing the inherent value of a person’s intention that gives house the awareness that he may be hallucinating. so, once conscious, it’s not a surprise that house immediately asks for cuddy to put him in a ketamine-induced coma. 1) he’s clearly been thinking about it all episode, and 2) his subconscious acknowledges cuddy as someone he can completely trust. and really it’s not lost on me that house’s hallucinations starts after cuddy has decided to give him ketamine. he operates under the assumption that cuddy has a position of authority over his healthcare, that she uses that authority without hesitation, and that she does so with his best interests in mind; his fate is literally in her hands. and though this is frightening, namely for the utter lack of control he’s left with in the situation, she’s right for having done it !! and he knows that !! house knows cuddy does the right thing, even when it’s scary, maybe especially because it’s scary. she does the right thing because it not only makes medical sense but because it’s the caring thing to do !! it has the potential to end his pain !! it gives him hope !! it inspires him to do the hopeful thing too !! literally, at the very first opportunity he does what his hallucination of her did, and he asks her to do it !! because gregory house holds lisa cuddy in such high esteem that she not only represents power, humanity, sacrifice, and deliverance, but most importantly: hope and integrity