Just Some Thoughts

as is somehow Mandatory for jobs like these, anyone in a position of power made it their job to make everyone else’s lives as miserable as possible with constant micromanaging. like, i got told in a strongly worded email to reorder the $2 plastic shelves in my cubicle that i used to store spare paper. it was fucking dire.

but anyways. the reason i quit has to do with what im talking about in the original post. despite the fact that i was consistently at the top of our department leaderboards (yes, we had those, they were emailed out daily) my manager decided that because i couldn’t stay late one day because of a doctors appointment, i needed a Talking To.

he spent an entire day hounding me about this single event, saying that it was a “growing pattern of careless behavior” and that i “forced [my coworkers] to stay until 6 pm”

obviously i felt awful. i was friends with everybody on my team! i didnt want to inconvenience them!! even thought i knew that he was being too harsh, the guilt trip still got to me. but every time i tried to defend myself and explain what was actually going on, he would double down and make it an even bigger issue. this kept going and going until the situation got spun into me being a terrible employee who needed an Action Plan, and i was Ruining The Department, and Everyone Was Going To Stay Overtime Because Of Me.

while i was dealing with this instead of, yknow, actually doing the work that is apparently so dire, i realized… it wasn’t that serious. like, not even fuckin close. the things my coworkers had to do overtime to complete? folding papers. and while yes, it was shitty that they had to stay so late to finish up, i wasn’t the one who made them do it. my manager did! and there were literally dozens of other options to pick from instead, including just leaving the work for me to do the next day! the work we did was nowhere near time sensitive, and certainly not worth the overtime the company paid.

but because i wouldn’t just roll over and accept a chewing out that i didn’t deserve, my manager decided to keep laying on the pressure until i caved. man was assigning legitimately apocalyptic levels of intensity over folding papers. i went from being an asset to the team to getting yelled at by both him and his manager for my “poor performance.”

so i quit. because it’s not that serious.

this whole shitshow is a standard tactic that employers use to trick you into signing away more of your life to the job. make you feel stupid, make you feel like the menial tasks you perform have these dire consequences that simply do not exist. ramp up your anxiety over nothing. they will punish other people because you aren’t slaving away hard enough, and then say that it’s your fault in the first place. you’re not being a team player! you’re not pulling your weight! don’t you see that everyone else is doing their part? don’t you understand what will happen if you don’t contribute?

it is absolutely fucking vital that you don’t listen to any of it. it is even more so that you don’t fall for it when they try to pull this tactic to get you to turn against someone else. the most effective tactic to get someone to fall in line in a workplace is social ostracization. don’t be a tool for your boss to use to manipulate someone else.

They want total control over you. Not just trans people. Not just queer people. You. Everyone.

Trans people are just a scapegoat. They want total control over everyone's self expression. They want the right to mold you into their perfect little cog in their dehumanizing machine.

🏳️‍⚧️ TRANSGENDER DAY OF VISIBILITY 🏳️‍⚧️

Do you truly believe that having belly fat makes people disgusting? That the media should have final say on how you feel about yourself? If you don't believe it and there is a mismatch between your moral beliefs and your gut reaction to your appearance...

Proceeds are donated to the UNRWA, which is one of the major funding agencies providing aid to Palestine. Recently, the US and other major countries have escalated genocidal efforts by cutting funding from the UNRWA, as AlJazzera reports : Which countries have cut funding to the UNRWA and why?

The culture of a lot of left leaning and "fandommy" sites (tumblr, twitter, etc) tends to fear/dislike (or just not know about) a lot of the IT stuff used by people into online privacy because they asscoiate it with "techbros". ESPECIALLY anything even remotely involving cryptocurrency. But if Trump is going to start censoring things and making morning after pills harder to get now might be a VERY good time for Americans to get into online privacy and how to avoid being tracked as well as avoiding censorship. Perhaps even some crypto to buy things discretly (or perhaps if ICE agents start caring about cash?) and because many activists groups also take donations in crypto. Never dealt with crypto myself but from what I know Monero was designed to be more untracable than Bitcoin. Don't know how succesfull that is though. Definetly get into privacy in general though.

I'll leave some useful links to get started. Words of advice:

Don't install a fuckton of privacy extensions on your browser, your unique combination of extensions will give your browser a unique fingerprint. Instead read up on and pick a few commonly used ones.

The BIGGEST annoyance for me was acedemic/proffesional settings because noone wants to switch over to some software they never heard off for one group project. Personally I use some normie software for exclusivly proffesional purposes with NO other information on me and do my actual browsing/leisure computer use more privatly.

https://www.privacytools.io/os: General software/browser/etc recomendations.

https://coveryourtracks.eff.org/: Test how private your browser is.

https://www.torproject.org/: THE gold standard for privacy focused browsers. Also obscures ip. Might not always be practical. Has the disadvantage of being notoriously slow and is blocked by some services/websites to avoid people bypassing ip bans and whatnot. Probably don't use this as your everyday browser but if you ever need to look up anything without censorship use tor.

https://tails.net/: Install a portable mini operating system on a usb stick to browse privately from any computer.

https://www.eff.org/ Electronic frontier foundations website.

https://mastodon.social/explore Don't have experience with it myself. But open source social media that should be much harder to censor.

I used to work for a call center and I was doing a political survey and I called this number that was randomly generated for me and the way our system worked was voice-activated so when the other person said hello you’d get connected to them, so I just launch right into my “Harvard University and NPR blah blah blah” thing and then there’s this long pause and I think the person’s hung up even though I didn’t hear a click

And then I hear “you shouldn’t be able to call this number.”

So I apologize and go into the preset spiel about because we aren’t selling anything, etc. etc. and the answer I get is

“No, I know that. What I mean is that it should be impossible for you to call this number, and I need to know how you got it.”

I explain that it’s randomly generated and I’m very sorry for bothering him, and go to hang up. And before I can click terminate, I hear:

“Ma’am, this is a matter of national security.”

I accidentally called the director of the FBI.

There was no MS Dos involved. Instead, there was a proprietary type-based OS and an actually-uses-transistors refrigerator-sized computer with switches I had to trip at certain times during the night as I watched the data flow from six pm to six AM on Fridays and weekends. If things got stuck, I reset the server. 

The company handled everything from low-end data (hotel and car reservations) to flight plans and tower information. I was weighed every time I came in to make sure it was me. Areas of the building had retina scanners on doors. 

During training. they took us through all the procedures. Including the procedures for the red phone. There was, literally, a red phone on the shelf above my desk. “This is a holdover from the cold war.” They said. “It isn’t going to come up, but here’s the deal. In case of nuclear war or other nation-wide disaster, the phone will ring. Pick up the phone, state your name and station, and await instructions. Do whatever you are told.”

So my third night there, it’s around 2am and there’s a ringing sound. 

I look up, slowly. The Red phone is ringing.

So I reach out, I pick up the phone. I give my name and station number. And I hear every station head in the building do the exact same. One after another, voices giving names and numbers. Then silence for the space of two breaths. Silence broken by…

“Uh… Is Shantavia there?”

It turns out that every toll free, 1-900 or priority number has a corresponding local number that it routs to at its actual destination. Some poor teenage girl was trying to dial a friend of hers, mixed up the numbers, and got the atomic attack alert line for a major air-travel corporation’s command center in the mid-west United States.

There’s another pause, and the guys over in the main data room are cracking up. The overnight site head is saying “I think you have the wrong number, ma’am.” and I’m standing there having faced the specter of nuclear annihilation before I was old enough to legally drink.

Seriously, this is legit.

In December 1955, Sears decided to run a Santa hotline.  Here’s the ad they posted.

Only problem is, they misprinted the number.  And the number they printed?  It went straight through to fucking NORAD.  This was in the middle of the Cold War, when early warning radar was the only thing keeping nuclear annihilation at bay.  NORAD was the front line.

And it wasn’t just any number at NORAD.  Oh no no no.

Terri remembers her dad had two phones on his desk, including a red one. “Only a four-star general at the Pentagon and my dad had the number,” she says.

“This was the ‘50s, this was the Cold War, and he would have been the first one to know if there was an attack on the United States,” Rick says.

The red phone rang one day in December 1955, and Shoup answered it, Pam says. “And then there was a small voice that just asked, ‘Is this Santa Claus?’ ”

His children remember Shoup as straight-laced and disciplined, and he was annoyed and upset by the call and thought it was a joke — but then, Terri says, the little voice started crying.

“And Dad realized that it wasn’t a joke,” her sister says. “So he talked to him, ho-ho-ho’d and asked if he had been a good boy and, ‘May I talk to your mother?’ And the mother got on and said, ‘You haven’t seen the paper yet? There’s a phone number to call Santa. It’s in the Sears ad.’ Dad looked it up, and there it was, his red phone number. And they had children calling one after another, so he put a couple of airmen on the phones to act like Santa Claus.”

“It got to be a big joke at the command center. You know, ‘The old man’s really flipped his lid this time. We’re answering Santa calls,’ ” Terri says.

And then, it got better.

“The airmen had this big glass board with the United States on it and Canada, and when airplanes would come in they would track them,” Pam says.

“And Christmas Eve of 1955, when Dad walked in, there was a drawing of a sleigh with eight reindeer coming over the North Pole,” Rick says.

“Dad said, ‘What is that?’ They say, ‘Colonel, we’re sorry. We were just making a joke. Do you want us to take that down?’ Dad looked at it for a while, and next thing you know, Dad had called the radio station and had said, ‘This is the commander at the Combat Alert Center, and we have an unidentified flying object. Why, it looks like a sleigh.’ Well, the radio stations would call him like every hour and say, ‘Where’s Santa now?’ ” Terri says.

For real.

“And later in life he got letters from all over the world, people saying, ‘Thank you, Colonel,’ for having, you know, this sense of humor. And in his 90s, he would carry those letters around with him in a briefcase that had a lock on it like it was top-secret information,” she says. “You know, he was an important guy, but this is the thing he’s known for.”

“Yeah,” Rick [his son] says, “it’s probably the thing he was proudest of, too.”

So yeah.  I think that might be the best wrong number of all time.

I'm from watching Woman of the Hour and it brings to light the devastating reality that, for many women, a sense of physical and emotional safety is often out of reach, especially in their encounters with men. It's heart-wrenching that women constantly have to worry about their safety in the most ordinary situations, hoping that an interaction with a man won’t end with them getting hurt, manipulated, or even killed. Watching this film, you're faced with a blunt, uncomfortable truth: that women often navigate life with a lingering sense of dread, a hope that every man they meet will turn out to be "safe," but always carrying the terrible weight of possibility that he won’t be. It reveals how, in these situations, women are forced to read every shift in body language, every change in tone, every uncomfortable glance, constantly calculating how to respond so they can make it home alive. The awareness of an energy shift, of a moment when a man’s demeanor turns from kind to cold, or when a friendly conversation starts feeling forced and tense, is a brutal reality. Women feel that change instinctively, and the unease can quickly transform from discomfort into fear, knowing that the wrong word, the wrong look, or the wrong reaction could set off a chain of events that end in violence. It's a tragic and exhausting experience, one that's deeply ingrained in the female experience.The fact that women feel pressure to "entertain" men, to always appear sweet, polite, or funny, is itself exhausting, often feeling more like survival than simple social interaction. It's heartbreaking that so many women find themselves in situations where they have to be agreeable, even when it’s uncomfortable, because showing irritation or anger could be dangerous. They might go as far as to sleep with someone simply because he’s "nice," or out of pity, feeling they owe it to him to avoid confrontation, and because they have been conditioned to see politeness as a form of safety.

The concept of the "friend zone" has often been wielded as a tool of emotional pressure, shaping a narrative where men feel entitled to romantic or sexual interest from women simply because they’ve been "nice" or "supportive." It’s as if the term was created to frame kindness and friendship as some kind of down payment on a relationship. For some men, the "friend zone" suggests that a woman’s friendship alone isn't enough and that, if she doesn’t eventually “pay back” his kindness with romance or intimacy, she’s somehow wronging him. This idea implies a transactional approach to relationships, where the efforts made to be close to a woman such as acts of kindness, companionship, or attention,..are seen as investments that ought to yield a "reward."

The "friend zone" narrative creates a damaging mindset, one that can foster resentment and blame against women for setting boundaries or valuing a man’s friendship without romantic interest. It suggests that by not reciprocating feelings, women are “leading men on” or being ungrateful, when in reality, they’re simply respecting their own feelings and agency. The pressure this creates is unfair, reducing a woman’s worth to her willingness to return affection, regardless of her own emotions, and dismissing the validity of any friendship that isn’t rooted in romance or sexual attraction.

This concept reinforces the notion that women "owe" men something for being present in their lives, which can be deeply manipulative and guilt-inducing. It suggests that if a woman is not romantically interested, she’s rejecting more than just romantic involvement, she’s failing in her role as a friend. The expectation underlying the "friend zone" myth pressures women to question their boundaries and can lead them to feel guilty or even question their own self-worth. It’s a framework that shifts blame onto women for simply following their feelings, which in reality, should be met with respect and understanding, rather than frustration or entitlement. The "friend zone" is ultimately a term that devalues genuine friendship and imposes unfair expectations on women, making it all the more crucial to challenge and dismantle this narrative.

Watching this movie, you get to see a woman facing a life-threatening situation with Rodney Alcala(he's serial killer btw) She could sense the threat looming over her, yet she managed to escape by performing a heartbreaking act of self-preservation. ( I literally cried in this scene..the way she told him "it's okay baby. We are okay" after finding herself SA'd and bleeding and having wounds all over..)By being "sweet," keeping things calm, and even comforting him, she put his emotions first, all while fearing for her life, just to buy herself a chance to survive. That desperation, that terrifying choice to soothe someone even after they’ve committed unimaginable violence, is a survival tactic no one should ever have to use.

The film underscores just how exhausting and painful it is to carry this kind of fear, knowing that a man could become violent at any moment. To be forced into adopting a "safe" demeanor when threatened—acting as if everything is fine to keep the peace—becomes a tragic survival mechanism. It’s heartbreaking that many women have to live like this, balancing on a razor’s edge, feeling like their words and actions are constantly under scrutiny, needing to be careful, needing to be "nice." And it brings a painful realization to the surface: being a woman often means carrying an internalized set of survival strategies simply to coexist in a world that doesn’t always value or protect women’s safety and autonomy.

Watching this movie ,you see the courage and resilience women have to summon just to navigate their lives, but it’s a courage born of necessity, of the hard reality that, for many women, safety is never guaranteed. It’s a haunting, deeply tragic insight into how hard and, at times, terrifying it can be to simply exist as a woman. Anna Kendrick really played her role well, all women did. Then the producers and directors did well by not going so deep into the graphics. I would never get why some feel the need to display these act of violents like SA or torture. It's so unnecessary to show the viewers such. Sometimes I feel I'm losing my mind and my heart is breaking and I just wanna let out a blood curdling scream every single time I think about what happens to women. The injustice.

It’s devastating to witness how the justice system and law enforcement have, time and again, failed women by not addressing violence and abuse against them with the urgency and seriousness they deserve. For countless women, reporting incidents of rape, domestic violence, or even feeling unsafe doesn’t lead to protection or justice but often to dismissive attitudes, skepticism, and even blame. Far too often, women are questioned, doubted, or shamed for coming forward, as if they’re responsible for the crimes committed against them. This dismissive culture within law enforcement can make women feel as though their pain, fear, and trauma are trivial, as if their safety simply doesn’t matter as much. It’s heartbreaking and infuriating that cases of assault and abuse are frequently minimized or dismissed, leaving many women unprotected and without a path toward healing or justice.