the memory hurts but does me no harm

i dont agree with outdoor cats but i gotta admit the fact me and my roommate can fondly talk about local cats like theyre our beloved neighbours is pretty cool. do i know any of the humans who live in my neighborhood? not particularly. do i know the little tuxedo cat with the pink collar who recognises the ice cream truck music and comes out to get pets from all the kids? of course they're a local celebrity to me.

nice outfit dude LOL. legolas called. apparently they're taking the hobbits somewhere really crazy

it bothers me that you often don't really hear about people having a "favorite album" the way they might have a favorite movie or favorite video game

fuck it. reblog this and tell me in the tags what your favorite album is

My understanders will Understand me

and As Such . My misinterpreters will Misinterpret me . The price for speaking my truth .

it’s never a normal temperature anymore it’s always some fucking bullshit

queer discourse final boss

so i hauve covid rn and i must say, American cold medicine is the absolute bees knees. You go to a UK pharmacy and they tenderly press like eight (8) paracetamol into the palm of your hand... God FORBID you're sick in France, i had to scour every pharmacy in Paris for something that wasn't HOMEOPATHIC PASTILLES. meanwhile last night i took the last of my stash of Nyquil that expired in 2019 and it was like getting hit by a fucking baseball bat (affectionate). press X to timeskip. LOVE me a cheeky little medically induced coma. you can really feel that it's a precursor to meth. i know that everything is fucking awful over there my friedns and my heart goes out to every one of you but if you need one small bright light of national pride in this time of strife please know that i envy you your cold medicine every day

i once took an american antihistamine pill just a basic one for seasonal allergies and i had to immediately lay down and while doing so i vividly hallucinated that i was a steerage passenger on the titanic resigned to my death as my cabin filled up rapidly with water. then i blacked out and when i woke up again my allergies were gone for the entire season.

The Hat Man is our greatest export

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?

whenever people talk about working in an office i never even consider what their office does. they work at Business doing Business Things. have Meetings and Drink Coffee. you are a cartoon character to me