Just things

shoutout to Scotland just jumping in there for a few years and then peacing out

the difference between crowley and aziraphale is that crowley would jump in front of a bullet for aziraphale whereas aziraphale would literally kill anyone who dared to point a gun at crowley

sometimes cats look so regal and majestic, sometimes they are just a blob melting off the side of a bed or coffee table, and sometimes they are a roast chicken

dc literally has better villains than marvel because marvel antagonists are always like “i wear ALL BLACK and THREE PIECE SUITS and i kill people because i’m SAD inside” meanwhile everyone in gotham just be off the shits and have an actual aesthetic and presentation  

The villain’s in Gotham are better because no one can out do Bruce Wayne in  “i wear ALL BLACK and THREE PIECE SUITS and i beat up people because i’m SAD inside” so they had to come up with something else.

this is the only response anyone is allowed to put on this post actually 

mr. fantastic: he is awful

people understand that Spanish speakers speak different dialects of the Spanish language but don’t understand that black people speak a dialect of the English language

I just want to state for the record that this is completely uncontroversial among linguists. It’s the first day of sociolinguistics class.

It’s true. It’s not the fire suppression system that kills you. The Librarians come and personally murder you for starting a fire in a library. But you didn’t start a fire you say? No matter. You are collateral damage. Everybody gets killed to show that arsonists have no chance of escaping justice

I desperately want to see a scene with Thor and Loki where they have to remove all of their weapons. Thor puts down Mjolnir while we spend the next 5 minutes watching Loki remove most of his knives.

ive been thinking and honest to god: i think i would actually join a girl gang if the offer came. like a legitimate, hierarchical, “let’s carry knives under our skirts and beat up men” gang. fuck college

and this was no “5 girls in a small town” who made the news—this was yakuza level shit. 20,000 girls getting into gang fights and shoplifting and getting pissed off that only men were allowed to be rough and violent and angry

so anyways. who up for a girl gang

This doesn’t do the moment justice. He took the swig of vodka, said “I’ll fucking do it darling”, and then ABSOLUTELY NAILED IT in one fucking take

Mood for 2019: “I’ll fucking do it, darling.”

I have to laugh when I see folks going “well, what if the artist didn’t intend for there to be any deep symbolism?” The Death of the Author entirely aside, any artist can tell you that the fact that you didn’t intend for there to be any deep symbolism doesn’t mean you didn’t put some there anyway. I personally know multiple fanfic writers who’ve put together what they thought was just an interesting bit of fluff, then they went back and re-read their own story a month later and they were all: “oh, god dammit - this is about my relationship with my mother, isn’t it?”

I came out to have a good time and honestly I’m feeling so attacked right now.

I know I told this story before but last year I was having complications with a surgery and I just broke down in a public place and I was trying to gather myself, sitting and leaning on a wall when this girl in cowboy boots approached me and sat down and she asked what was wrong and I told her it was medical issues and she said “I understand, I have to have my foot amputated next week” and it shocked me out of crying and I was like “wow that sucks!” And she said “yeah.” And then she just touched my arm so tenderly and told me “I promise you that this problem will have its place, and everything is going to work out.” And the way she said it just made me really believe her. She said. “We’re just gonna have to cowgirl up.” And then she stood up and walked away and I’d call that a genuine encounter with an angel but the truth is there is a lot of goodness right here on earth in humanity and it’s shining and pure.

Okay but “this problem will have its place” is genuinely inspiring

THAT REALLY STRUCK ME because I’ve always hated the tired rhetoric of “this happened for a reason” and this feels like a more genuine, comforting take on that. Not “it happened for a reason,” but “this will find its spot in your life and your future that it fits into in a way that will eventually work out even though it sucks that it happened.” Love that.

We’re just gonna have to cowgirl up