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Anything you do while wearing a sports bra is technically a sport. Scrolling through tumblr might not seem like a sport to you, but it is to your boobs! They're locked in! They're focused! They're competing! They're playing to win!

whatever thoughtless thing someone said or did that permanently changed you, they don't remember and never will. you are also this person to someone else. the only freedom is acceptance. basketball wizard blast

it's called a fadeaway jumper

There’s an emotion only unlocked when you live in a house with multiple stories. I call it “the stair emotion” and it’s when you realize the object you need is on the other side of yet another trip up and down those goddamn stairs. It’s the closest I get to transcending the desire for material goods. Maybe I don’t need that notebook. Maybe I don’t need anything.

not many people know this but when talking about your multiple pronoun-using friend you build up a combo meter for every subsequent unique pronoun you use

Polycules should be able to trade people like sports teams do

Listen -- you're a good defender and your pussy is fantastic, but that's not what our team needs right now. We're trading you to Greater Boston in exchange for someone who has a car.