it hurts to become

Maybe if I just work harder, this empty cup will pour again

Maybe the cup needs a bit of time to rest and refill?

Maybe the cup needs to lock the fuck in???

santos needing so badly to hang out with anyone that she invites both mel and and becca, who she does not know, with her. santos caring more about not being alone than potentially seeming vulnerable. santos doing the same with whitaker. where she would rather have someone invade her house and live there indefinitely rather than being alone. her horrible day forcing her to recognise that the danger of being alone is greater than the danger of being vulnerable. the kicked dog bites but it would rather bare its teeth than feel abandoned. kicked dog would rather have someone to bark at than be alone. and maybe the kicked dog won't bite at all if finds out that it might get a pet instead of a kick

You can survive your childhood and escape the horror of your parents by creating and existing solely in a rich inner world in which you contain all your thoughts and feelings and this will not have any effect on your relationships as an adult