upward and onward @sandradisenchanted - Tumblr Blog

Fuck I’m at a fencing tournament and literally a minute after I reblogged this my dad told me that he talked to the point people and I’m probably going to win a medal.

seananmcguire

BURN BAGEL BURN

gothiccharmschool

OH WHY NOT?

harukami

I need to follow up to say I reblogged this last night, and this morning I got some of the best news of my life, like, a life dream come true news thing.

Bagel what are your powers

acabosetotal

FUCK, I though it was just another lucky meme but LISTEN. Since a week ago I was waiting a phone call to confirm me if I got a job or not in my university. I reblogged this yesterday’s night “just for fun and because I don’t want any bagel to be mad with me”, and today’s afternoon, while I was losing my time as always, the professor I was supposed to work with called me and asked me for my personal information to start working with her.

THE BAGEL POWERS ARE WAY TOO MUCH FOR THIS WORLD

token-white-friend

I GOT A JOB THE DAY AFTER MY QUEUE POSTED THIS THE FIRST TIME AND I JUST REALIZED IT WHEN I SAW IT AGAIN HOLY GOD

noodle-dragon

The bagel hasn’t let me down yet!

blackcatgodess

I got a job offer after reblogging the bagel. Believe in the bagel!

anayely420

🙏🏼

sonsfantasies

Worth a try lol

theblizzardsix

i could use some good news or even a good girl

pantspooplover

Go lil bagle! Show me your power!

itaachiyama-moved

Okii then!

blastlight

THIS IS THE FIRST THING ON MY BLOG

I GOT ASKED OUT FOR THE FIRST TIME AFTER I REBLOGGED IT

cuappatea-deactivated20200216

wait but whats happening with the bagel tho

toca144

Giv news

maiskinny

This bagel better do me and my skinnies some wonders.

st0nedsk1nnygrl

im passed my drivers test🙏🏽

becoming-a-flame

pls

notjoyfulanymore

Oh hope this works, i need some good news in my life lmao

airm0ld

plz bagel plssss 🙏

fiftyshadesofthinspi

BLESS US ALL OH HOLY FIRE BAGEL

kissmycoldlips

Bagel, pls

cari-cry

bagel please i need this thank you

prick-o

pls bagel

karls-writing-space

Bagel please

t0rsly

I beg of you sir bagel

lil-stark-deactivated20240119

PLEASE BAGEL GOD

jennyloggins

fire bagel is the only fucker that has EVER worked for me, this one is Real

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mylordshesacactus

For all that the 1800s etiquette guides are--obviously--derangedly sexist from a modern perspective? They're also mindblowing in how casually they will assert things that MODERN DAY CONSERVATIVES would scream and cry and shit their pants about.

"People back then always married young it's natural!!!" Every single 1800s guide I've ever met casually mentions that, of course, you really shouldn't get married before you're at least 20, and waiting until 25 is usually better.

Or, like. Okay here's a long segment:

Just firmly going "it is crazy sexist to blame The Wife for overspending when thirty seconds of asking questions will immediately establish that her husband was outright lying to her about how much money they had. Talk to your wife like a normal person."

Or--okay, here. A section on being honest and not writing love letters in secret, because that's usually a good sign that there's something untoward going on....

....except that he then immediately acknowledges that sometimes, the reason you're hiding this from your parents is that your parents suck. That there are parents who frankly have not earned the right to approve or disapprove of your partner.

(I realize the phrasing there sounds a lot less strong than my summary, but--trust me on this. When you're familiar with the narrative voice of these kinds of books, this passage is downright radical. The mere acknowledgement that if you treat your kids badly, it's your own damn fault when they don't talk to you? I've genuinely never seen that before in this genre. Don't freak out over "properly trained", either. It's just a linguistic shift--at the time, "training" was used the way we would say "raising" a child today. )

batmanisagatewaydrug

Tumblr being the "piss on the poor" reading comprehension site makes sense when you realize that 79% of adults in the US are functionally illiterate. Same goes for Twitter and TikTok.

that's a real high number, sport. where'd you get it?

batmanisagatewaydrug

hey anon

please tell me you didn't google "US literacy rates" and then make the funniest possible mistake one could make in that situation

roscolux

need to beam this tweet directly into everyone's minds right now

derinthescarletpescatarian

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motherfuckingshakespeare

A HANDY CHART FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THESE. NOTE THAT THESE ARE ALL THE INFORMAL AND YOU IS THE FORMAL SO LIKE YOU WOULD ALWAYS ADDRESS YOUR SUPERIOR/ OLDER PERSON/ SOCIAL BETTER WITH YOU BUT WITH YOUR BUDS YOU CAN USE THESE.

heroineimages

I’m not sure I knew the thy/thine distinction. Thanks for this!

onbearfeet

THINE IS ALSO GRAMMATICALLY EQUIVALENT TO YOURS.

“It is yours” and “It is thine” differ only in their level of formality.

hgedits

json-derulo

it pains me to say it but the more people talk shit about the women who wear those shorts/leggings with the weird butt seam that looks like it gives you a terminal wedgie, the more compelled I feel to take the women’s side

json-derulo

ohhhhhh my godddddddd you saw someone wearing really tight revealing pants in public? should we throw a party? should we invite goody proctor

json-derulo

and while we’re at it, I’m done worrying about cameltoe. I don’t have time to be pulling and tugging at my clothes all day. if you can see the outline of my pussy you should say thank you and go about your business

json-derulo

SAME WITH NIPPLES!!!!

json-derulo

fruitzzone

you need to be more normal about fwb. no, fwb don’t strip you of your dignity. they are not unhealthy. sexual relationships are not bad. it’s not weird to want them and not romance. friends can fuck. you don’t have to be involved romantically to be intimate with someone. that includes all sorts of physical touch because you are also not normal about platonic non-sexual touch. it’s not weird if friends cuddle, sleep in one bed, hold hands or kiss. friends can be affectionate with each other. it doesn’t mean they are romantically attracted to each other. nor does it mean they will ever be in a romantic relationship. you need to be more normal about touch and sex in general.

valkyrieblu

As someone who is aromantic, jesus christ

FUCKING

THIS.

queerprayers

house I am staying in for work usually houses a ~christian marriage counselor~ and I flipped through a book and stopped in my tracks. it had not occurred to me, no.

eatyourpapitas

it's not a cuck chair it's for our exorcist

villainessbian

Selling my services as sexorcist.

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babyfoxcollectionthings

zitasaurusrex

unrestrained summer fun

scoutsmoocrew

This person needs to be arrested im going to cry

sapper-in-the-wire-old

How do you go through all the effort of setting up a sous vide to do this????

swagforbirds

never tell me that magic isnt real ever again when this is clear evidence of a person transmogrifing Meat into Wood

thyrell

i can transmogrify meat into wood by lookin at pictures of titties if ya get what im sayin

weaselle

hey, we all love tiddies here but this person has perpetrated a crime against nature and we need you stay focused

yume-fanfare

i think it's really fun when a rly specific trope is super popular in one particular medium but in other ones it's just totally unheard of. it's the time knife. visual novel players are suuuuper used to death games but many others encountered them for the first time in squid games. the other day my mom showed me all excited the summary of a super original novel she found and it was about a girl who got reincarnated as the main character in her favorite fantasy book

paperjoshi

what the fuck is a time knife

bramblepatch

strawberrylovely

undeadentropy

Time knife is a form of time knife

noah-wyles

this is such a fantastic and reassuring response

homunculus-argument

Has either of your parents ever accidentally called you/your siblings the wrong name? (someone else's name, like other sibling, pet, etc)

Yes, at least once

No, but I've seen it happen to someone else

No, never

I don't have pets/siblings/parents/hair

Voting ended onJul 9

homunculus-argument

I forgot to clarify that this excludes deanaming you if you've changed your name. I specifically meant the "brain offers the wrong word" kind of accidental name mix-up.

This was prompted by me and my boyfriend discussing handedness and being able to tell apart left and right. And me, being ambidextrous, was baffled by how do people with an obligate dominant hand mix up which side is the one with their Writing Hand and which one isn't?? And my boyfriend pointed out that I go "turn left - no I mean right" so much when giving directions that I have lost my navigator privileges.

I argued that mixing up the words isn't the same thing as mixing up the directions. Like if your mom accidentally called you the dog's name doesn't mean that she literally can't tell you apart from the dog. And he looked at me like this

Because evidently not only has this never happened to him, he has never heard of this being a thing. And he was so confident in this that I had to double-check that I'm not the only person this has ever happened to.

istadris

I have four siblings. My parents have both gone at least once through the whole rooster before getting the right name

digitaldiscipline

Everyone with siblings knows the feeling of having their name yelled first because you're the main troublemaker, even if you're innocent this time.

kittydesade

My mom once went through both siblings, an aunt, and the dogs name before she got to mine.

#i am in my 30s #my mom now says whatever name comes to mind #be it child adult grandkid or dog #and if the correct person doesn't respond she get sassy and say we should know who she means #unfortunately that holds water because we generally know who she's talking about

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kaelio

stuckinapril

I promise you things will get so much better when you start processing people’s behavior as information rather than a verdict on your self-worth. If someone doesn’t text back, suddenly pulls away, whatever it may be, the solution isn’t to put on a tap dance for them and try to regain their approval. It’s not to crash out on them and try to force them to react a certain way. It’s just to take a step back, take a deep breath, and assess what this tells you. What’s this saying about them? What’s this saying about you??

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