Eeby deeby straight to hell

this chapter is turning into an exercise for how many different ways I can draw someone bedraggled and miserable

do y’all remember before direct messages tumblr had a dumbass ask limit of 10 per hour and communication was impossible until they introduced dumbass fan mail and we were basically sending telegraphs back in forth trying to communicate those were…dark times

Do y'all remember when they finally gave us direct messages and instead of doing it normally, they gave it to a few people at a time and we had to infect each other with it like a virus

remember when any post with more than like 6 people talking was unreadably smushed except for the last few additions remember when any post of over 500 characters became a link back to op’s blog readmore style remember when video and audio posts had about a 10% chance of working when you click play

As a recent user I love finding out shit like this from older users. What the fuck guys???? Why were you USING IT AT ALL?!??

believe it or not, we liked that more

its worth noting that immediately after these updates that made everything better, we were all angry about it

still angry about it. also if they change it back I'll be angry about it. fuck you Tumblr, never change

Does anyone know what to do about the temperature and also the prices

I'm no longer having "what if I won the lottery" fantasies anymore, I'm on isekai levels of delusional fantasies nowadays. Get me the hell out of here

Oh. Shit.

i think everyone in the whole world forgot that mystery doesn’t have to equal crime

sometimes it’s just like. what happent ?

scooby do

i take my tomestone to ishgard and show it to a sickly brume child and i say theres this band called imagine dragons do u wanna listen and he stares shellshocked off into the distance and says i dont have to imagine them

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

50 pounds of cocaine

One time I spent money registering a domain like "dotat.horse" because I wanted an email address which was as difficult as possible to give out

I think it was something like [email protected]. I never used it for anything for obvious reasons

pulling yourself up by your strap-on or whatever they say

jesus CHRIST

I need this on my blog it’s mandatory

I believe this belongs here.

I desire a hamburger.

wHAT

hello to 2012 from 2023

gonna tell my kids this was welcome to nightvale

i spent several hours going around to various shops the other day looking for a goddamn tamagoyaki pan and let me tell you i have never empathized with a comic more in my life

imagining someone in the world making use of my 4pm on a monday doodles is sick as hell