Art Comms Available
Hi I could use some extra cash at the moment, so I’m opening up a few art comm slots.
Pricing of ~$10 per hour it takes me to work on, with a flat fee of $10 if it takes me less than an hour.
Examples
Fai_Ryy
almost home
occasionally subtle
Today's Document
Sweet Seals For You, Always
noise dept.
Monterey Bay Aquarium
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"


shark vs the universe

Andulka
Cosmic Funnies

pixel skylines
DEAR READER

Product Placement

PR's Tumblrdome
trying on a metaphor
wallacepolsom
Show & Tell

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@rogueinkglitch
Art Comms Available
Hi I could use some extra cash at the moment, so I’m opening up a few art comm slots.
Pricing of ~$10 per hour it takes me to work on, with a flat fee of $10 if it takes me less than an hour.
Examples

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
everyone: can that terrible old fuck senator just die already
Graham had just returned from Kyiv, Ukraine, where he met with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy.
everyone: I guess we should have been more specific
everyone: well, anyway
just a heads up. im gonna do a big curse soon
okay so honestly i wasn’t expecting they’d be able to hide the body for this long
LINDSEY GRAHAM ?
This is kinda ominous ngl
Gotta compliment him on his reflexes. No hesitation. Just described exactly what he was seeing, regardless of what it was.
[VD: A weatherman is giving a report and pointing to a map, saying "feel like temperatures really take a tumble too, because after the storm-" before he is interrupted by the screen going black and then displaying a picture of some baby spinach. He says, "um," then immediately points to the screen and confidently announces, "this is baby spinach." /End VD]
(Source)
Graham was a homophobe and was seen as one of Trump's closest allies in the Senate.
Graham's death, which was unexpected, comes as the nation is expectantly waiting for the death of former Republican Senate Leader Sen. Mitch McConnell — who was hospitalized weeks ago and has mysteriously not made any public appearances, statements, or updates since.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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this heatwave fucking sucks how am I going to serve my liege like this
im never leaving this hellsite
i swear if this is the second stupid sword picture post i make that gets to 10k i'll just go kill someone
FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!
People are like “these animals have exoskeletons and these ones have endoskeletons” but no. It’s all exoskeletons, your exoskeleton is protecting your bone marrow which is where your soul (which is you) is. The rest of the stuff is extraneous decoration that Big Pharma wants you to think is important/
Why do you think there’s so few ghosts around? Why are most ghosts people who died violently? You gotta crack the bones to let the soul out. Most souls are trapped alone in the dark and silent ground (or teaching hospitals) for hundreds or thousands of years until the bones eventually start to break. People who are cremated get their whole soul released and it can reincarnate. But if someone dies violently then maybe only a couple of their bones are cracked and a little scrap of the soul escapes but it’s incomplete and confused. Can’t figure out how to leave, gets obsessed with its own circumstances, repeats actions, CANNOT be reasoned with. PROOF that the soul is in the marrow.
See I know what I’m talking about.
Sin is stored in the teeth btw which is why young children are innocent (they’ll get a do-over with replacement teeth) and the elderly are shameless (once you have no teeth to remember your sins, you have nothing to fear).
Upon review I think that maybe vodka isn’t for me.
#man this guy should write a book or something
Next treegrave universe book they’re all trapped on a spaceship and some dude fractures his arm and now the ship is Haunted
and sometimes when you break a bone, you haunt yourself
it pains me to say it but the more people talk shit about the women who wear those shorts/leggings with the weird butt seam that looks like it gives you a terminal wedgie, the more compelled I feel to take the women’s side
ohhhhhh my godddddddd you saw someone wearing really tight revealing pants in public? should we throw a party? should we invite goody proctor
and while we’re at it, I’m done worrying about cameltoe. I don’t have time to be pulling and tugging at my clothes all day. if you can see the outline of my pussy you should say thank you and go about your business
SAME WITH NIPPLES!!!!
My only question is how people survive tye sensory nightmare of those clothes like damn I commend your abilities if my clothes are even mildly form fitting I will cry
I only hate certain types of fic the same way I hate mosquitos and ticks. Like get these nasty little buggers away from me but also I respect their place in the ecosystem.
Me, spraying bug spray: blocked.
Listen and sometimes? To enjoy running through a beautiful field of grass and flowers (ao3) you have to tolerate the fact that bugs (fics you don’t like) are there and maybe you will even encounter one, but you can use bugspray (filtered tags) to reduce the likelihood of that. Because the alternative is not getting to experience the beautiful field of grass and flowers.
And some of my mutuals happen to be entomologists. Which is also cool.
Even in a post-capitalist, post-consumerist world, you still need to produce goods, as a result of this, you need factories because it is more effective to have a few people making a lot of clothes in a factory than every woman being forced to sit down and spin wool all day.
The issue with factories is poor wages, unsafe working conditions and environmental impact, all of which can be fixed through things like regulatory bodies and unions, the issue is not the fact that goods are no longer all made at home

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Fun fact: by just using imaginary numbers, some Evil Math, and 101 rotating vectors You Can Create a shitty approximation of a fish.
two points of view on math fish
it isn't good art unless it's itself enough to get haters, so
win
it isn’t good art
unless it’s itself enough
to get haters, so
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
just so we’re clear if you’ve never actually seen a cybertruck in person and have only seen photos of them i cannot stress enough how much worse they look in real life. like i honestly don’t know how it’s possible. most things look basically the same in pictures and in real life. but as stupid and ugly as cybertrucks look in photos, every person i’ve spoken to who has seen one in real life agrees that they somehow look even worse in person. and i know you’re thinking to yourself “tah they already look so bad in photos, how can they possibly look even worse in person?” I DONT KNOW. the first time i saw one on the road i was on a phone call and i literally cut myself off in the middle of a sentence just to be like “oh my GOD.” just an incredibly, laughably, unbelievably bad vehicle. i’ve never experienced anything like it. they’re just so bad
They look like that because they have no detail.
A photo of anything else, seeing it at a smaller size, means missing some amount of detail, anything from a sense of depth to small components. Other cars all have small details which are usually related to issues like safety, aerodynamics, ergonomics, aesthetics and so forth. Many of these details are required to operate safely, which you might not even realize, including things like the curvature and shape of bumpers, visibility through mirrors, window design, and so forth.
The Cybertruck has none of these elements. The aesthetics, such as they are, revolve around specifically reducing and minimizing details, similar to the minimalist appearance in expensive houses. It does not include much in the way of safety design, or fuel efficient design (which still matters electric or not), or even ergonomics. Its lack of comfort to passengers is one of many notable faults. It is often described as resembling a child's drawing or bad render, and it's for the same reason. In both cases, the images lack fundamental elements which are even present in cars manufactured over a hundred years ago. Why does it look like that? Because it's a car shape minus every detail of a car that can be removed - full stop. Not just safely removed, but removed while still somewhat meeting the definition of being a car.
When you scale up something blocky but still a car, like a Jeep or something, you can see all the details. Even as square as a Jeep is, it has bumpers rounded and extended to reduce pedestrian injuries, crumple zones, flowing lines at specific points to reduce drag and aid fuel economy, clearly marked signal lights, doors built with human entry and exit in mind, windows that shatter safely but can't be peeled off the frame by hand, collision detection, fuel tanks that won't explode and so on. If you project a picture of a Cybertruck on the side of a building at actual size, it looks pretty much like a real life Cybertruck. A dumpster looks like a Cybertruck because it's the same zero detail shape. You think it looks big because your brain is going "wow there's that shape that has the detail of an image on my phone screen, wait why is it a thousand times bigger than the same image?"
When you scale up a Cybertruck it no substantive change in detail level, which makes it looks exactly the same, and that feels wrong. It looks like a toy at any size because a toy isn't supposed to work within and around living people, it just rolls along the ground and you try not to trip or choke on it. The bigger version of the small thing should come into sharper focus in person. A Cybertruck does not.
It's kind of funny because everything about it, even the uncanny appearance in person, always traces back to the fundamental truth, that it is a terrible vehicle.
Falkirk Cafes have started to beef over AI in advertising which led to one of the best ones posting this. Lol lol lol.
If I were in Scotland I would visit this cafe just because of this
Falkirk Cafes have started to beef over AI in advertising which led to one of the best ones posting this. Lol lol lol.
I pulled my sister in law for the family holiday gift swap this year and I'm vibrating with excitement. I've been wanting to get her for years. she's the most basic woman I've ever met and I mean that with admiration that borders on fear. Her house is full of inspirational quotes in cursive. Her bathroom has a "Lashes Long Coffee Strong" poster and she doesn't even drink coffee. Her makeup is Did. Her hair is Did. She is fashionably tipsy at every occasion. She sells bougie wine for a living and brings a hair curler with her on vacation. She is the maximalist luxury target consumer for literally everything. I am obsessed with her the way a gay man is obsessed with Liza Minelli. I would buy her a pink rhinestone car with lashes on the headlights if it wasn't a bit outside the secret santa spending limit.
Ideas I've had so far:
A gold plated wine opener with her name engraved on it
some kind of classy-but-cunty Christmas decor. Something chi-chi and sparkly that's giving "oh, it's Christmas, bitch"
one of those instax mini cameras in a color like "blossom pink" because you know this diva scrapbooks
those little bone china Tiffany's cups that are made to look like cheap disposable paper cups but they're Tiffany blue and they say "Tiffany's" on them (because you know this diva is obsessed with Tiffany's)
a Swarovski birthstone bracelet because you know this diva actually gives a shit about her birthstone
I hope none of this comes off as sarcastic because if my kidneys were gold and made by Louis Vuitton I'd give her one of those. This woman is delightful and friendly and warm and organizes the family photo with an air of command fit for a British naval commodore. She is more self-actualized than me, she is happier than me, her chi is clean, and she still talks about her quinceañera. Her wedding was "Tuscan-themed." How do I please this perfect angel. What should be my tribute
OP here is what you're going to do. There is no more basic bitch gift than a GIFT BASKET. You're going to assemble this one yourself.
It's going to have the gold plated wine opener with her name on it. It's going to have a scented candle. It's going to have a Lush bath bomb. It's going to have the pinkest loofah you can find. It's going to have a moisturizing face mask. It's going to have a little sign for her to hang on the bathroom door that says "Don't interrupt my ✨Diva Time✨" in glittery writing. It's going to have a sand-etched wine glass that says "Live, Laugh, Love, Drink Wine In The Bath". It's going to have some Lindt chocolate truffles. It's going to also have a sparkly christmas ornament and i trust you to pick one that fits the general theme here. If you still need to fill it in, you're going to add a gift card to Sephora or, if you would like bonding opportunities, a little envelope with a hand-written "gift card" for "[Spa day/mani-pedis/whatever] with your Favorite Sister-in-Law, you choose the day <3". Maybe also some cute scrapbook stickers.
You're going to get a basket and some of that shredded tissue paper filler, and you're going to arrange all this neatly in it. This woman is going to go CRAZY for a gift basket, and i think you know that in your heart.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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found this at an antique shop the other day and was immediately like oh this belongs on tumblr. sniles sneetly. fwowns fwangry.
OCism is also killing good writings. Because writers are creating characters first before having themes and goals. That's why your story sucked.
You have a character sheet and all sorts of details but you can't write a plot to save your life. Your pacing is dogshit.
This is one of the mildest opinions I have about writing. You people are absolutely not ready for my truly scathing takes. Stay strong.
Read more books. Read more reviews. Pay closer attention to the TV shows and movies you watch. In other words, take note of how each story progresses. Think more deeply about why you like a story or why you don't.
Watch interviews with writers and creators to understand how they approach storytelling. Most importantly, ignore fandoms because gimmicks and trends are fleeting but good storytelling is timeless.
Genuinely also it is ok to realize that what you want to write isn’t a novel, but a world guide. I loved reading various fantasy encyclopedias essentially as a kid and after years of trying to write stories I realized I don’t like writing stories, I like writing religions and history and politics and geography and zoology/biology. My favorite book for years was not a story but a field guide of dragons, in a completely fictional world that was unrelated to any property. I don’t recall what it was exactly anymore, but I read it cover to cover dozens of times. So even if it’s not initially what you think of when you think of a book or a writer, but it’s no less valid than writing a plot.