Welcome to the jungle

a lot of scares get like a second of reaction before the "oh -_-" moment but dude legit spent a solid ten seconds ready to be killed by a dragon

This is made 10x better by the account name being “anxietycouple”

reading this deposition that just got dropped where someone sued musk and ohhhh my god it is this funniest thing ever . i can see why his lawyer tried to keep this confidential . they’re both maybe the biggest idiots . this is like ace attorney

fun fact: the Mr. Bankston here is Mark Bankston, the same lawyer who absolutely ruined Alex Jones during the Sandy Hook trial.

how in the fuck did the muskrat's attorney pass the bar

Mark Bankston is gonna make me fucking SWOON.

- April 2024

"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

Don't let these prices hold you back! This fiendish kitty now coming in for only $6.89!

need some female director to lock in and make a movie where a grotesquely ugly and disgusting and monstrous woman slasher killer butchers handsome men in humiliating and sexualized ways. and it CAN'T be because they are rapists or abusers or otherwise misogynistic okay, she has to do it because she's a fucked up pervert

At least on 'the price is right' you know (because someone *actually told you*) that you are playing a guessing game and that there is an over/under mechanic and that the conquence of guessing wrong isn't a punishment or damaged relationship or getting fired

On an unrelated note my psychiatrist has given me a referal for a formal ASD evaluation

If you look at the actual history of the decline of empires, in the vast majority of cases it's less an immediate implosion and more a decades-long slide into geopolitical irrelevance, so it's pretty likely nobody reading this post will live to see the ultimate Fall of the American Empire™, but there's value in being there at the start, too.

(Like, cities burning is a striking image, but in practice that almost never happens on its own, even in the case of open civil war. You generally need foreign invaders taking advantage of a faltering empire's weakness for that, and who exactly are we imagining is going to conduct a land invasion of a US in decline? Fucking Canada?)