miscellaneous

love being trusted with “you cant tell anyone this” conversations and nodding a lot and forgetting everything they told me like god intended and going down as a trustworthy individual while doing literally zero work of ill or good

Amnesic neutral

a typo and suddenly you wish you were dad

On this bitch of an Earth as it is in Heaven.

@ the water that drips down my arms when i wash my face and makes a big ass mess: fuckin fight me

Will anything ever top the design of the DS Lite? No? With its Perfect size, weight, and cuteness? I don’t think so.

My guy was trying way too hard to look dumb

the pizza guy just looked straight behind me, smiled, and went “you both enjoy your pizza” ? i’m alone in my apartment???

*narrows eyes*

As I said before give 1 of 2 responses: 1) Smile and shake you head and point to nothing, “Oh no, he doesn’t like pizza.” Then close the door. 2) Wide eyes and whisper in a scared voice. “You can see her too.”

IT GOT BETTER

how these dudes in they 30s but can’t host?

Some people have wives