Pure-Panic

I scrolled down and thought this was a photograph of a painting sitting behind some candles. Not until I scrolled back up did I realise that the candles are part of the painting.

What

this is the only heritage post that matters to me

Adding “Tiktok Mary Poppins cosplayer respond to allegations that he was wearing a Third Reich medal in his latest fit by coming out as the reincarnation of Adolf Hitler complete with past life memories before his entire social media prescence was nuked with the sole exception of their egg-laying kink spotify playlists” to the internet sentences treasure vault. Amid all the societal decay we still got it boys.

While Jason Todd and Tim Drake are both tragedies, Jason is a Shakespearian tragedy (doomed by the narrative) while Tim is a Greek tragedy (doomed by himself/his own flaws). In this essay I will-

op where’s the rest of the essay

I love abusing the fuck out of the English language. I’ll just make a word up. Fuck it. Shakespeare did it too.

I’m going to string together a sentence that is so grammatically incorrect. Big fan of the “if you can understand what I meant, shut up about the way I said it” mentality. And I’m a writer.

You see a medieval manuscript where they spelled “chickens” 12 different ways and you just know this language is meant to be used and abused.

the time is now

not even jesus could save yall motherfuckers’ souls

cackling just continues to get louder as I scroll through

i think this is the first time an internet community has discovered something customizable and adamantly refused to make penises

of course this is the post where tumblr is like “Seems sfw to me!”

My laugh at this post is auditory evidence of just how sick I still am.

I’d usually post this to my NSFW blog but this is making me laugh so unreasonably hard that I can’t fucking breathe and therefore deserves to be on my main blog

How you gonna do us like that bruh???

ITS BACK

i guess this is the long post all the gays are collectively reblogging today huh

Idk how to work it on mobile which makes me sad

The one time the internet is expected to make dicks, the internet immediately makes everything except dicks.

I'm sorry I can't read that book you recommended. Yeah, no, it's just that beginning something new that I don't know if I'm in the mood for is to me what plastic bags are to horses and if you play 30 seconds of an unfamiliar audiobook I WILL spook and break two of my legs.

I have now seen have a bag of plastic bags attributed to growing up in a black household, a Latino household, an immigrant household, an Appalachian household and a “white trash” household. I think it’s time to just admit that we all have a plastic bag bag

- matriarch has a danish butter cookies tin filled with buttons

all humans do is save plastic bags, dumpling, pancake, fill cookie tin with buttons, stab and lie

fancy hats, finding repeated syllables in names cute, and narrative dance