Kinda Doing Okay

"hey op what the fuck does this mean" is tumblr's "ummm. he's right behind me isn't he"

Shocking how many people don’t know that hens lay non-fertilized eggs and think the yolk they’re eating is a baby chicken

once tried desperately to make my friend understand that yolks were not, like, a liquified potentiality of chicken, and she looked at me for a while and then said, "but they’re both yellow."

[image: a lemon.]

Image descriptions that incidentally make the joke infinitely funnier.

apparently my boss who is a professor at my school doesn’t have a cell phone and his coworkers were upset by this so they bought him a childs toy phone and labeled it “David’s jitterbug” (for those of you that don’t know jitterbugs are phones made for old people that have like massive buttons and shit) so the other day I walked into his office to ask him a question and he pressed a button on it which made it start loudly playing the ABCs and he said “excuse me I have to take this” and then started singing along to the ABCs while shooing me out of his office

i love this too much

gaslighting someone by saying they're too smart to be gaslit so you're not gaslighting them

this would work on me

No it wouldn’t. You’re too smart.

Posts like this are like modern day fables. Yeah ill reblog this funny little exchange, but next time someone says this to me ill remember this post and hear kill bill sirens.

You know that study that’s like “for years we thought bats must have great sonar because they never run into each other, then we got highspeed cameras and realized they actually crash into each other all the time” whenever I walk into a doorframe or a wall there’s a alien nature documentary guy in my head saying “we thought humans must have incredible balance due to their ability to be precise on 2 legs, but turns out they run into shit all the time”

#alien funny humans cam of a dude stubbing his toe rated ‘NOT CUTE’#‘although this human may look excited he is actually hopping up and down to keep weight off his injured foot.’#(alien zoologist chimes in to say toe injuries are the equivalent of getting a tentacle caught in a door and the human is fine)#(‘its a little alarming when they grab an injured body part and yell like that but actually it’s just a self-soothing behavior!’)#(‘this big guy will be fine in two klexkons. he just needs to be dramatic about it first! uwu’)#(*intense alien internet discourse ensues*) via hello-lo-lo-looo

MY GOD

damn just pay them a living wage

my controversial opinion is I don’t think Zuko was confused by “my first girlfriend turned into the moon”

he was there during siege of the North. he infiltrated the spirit oasis. he has an uncle who studies spirits and the spirit world. he watched the sky go dark then the moon suddenly reappear like everyone else in the entire world did. and most importantly he watched zhao get eaten by a giant godzilla fish spirit.

his entire life since he saw that beam of blue-white light in the south pole has been ‘this day has already been so goddamn weird’

The only really new information was that that was Sokka’s girlfriend

Also, Iroh was there? He literally watched Sokka make out with the moon spirit. And you want to tell me that a romantic sap like him would not have immediately told Zuko about this romantic tragedy? Please, Zuko has known about this for ages, he just knows that this is not an acceptable situation in which to say “yeah, I know.”

Special Event: All Horses’ Birthday (Southern Hemisphere only)

I would frame that shit and put it over my fireplace and make everyone who came into my home wonder.

Run it through some filters first to make it look like a painting and it will probably erase any sign of the ledge.

I love it!

wake up besties, new quiz just dropped 😌

1-800-ARE-YOU-GENTLY-SLAPPIN

You laugh while he's STARVING! 😭