Pommeri

everyone's "well-adjusted" and "mentally healthy" until the "sometimes I wish I'd never been born at all" part of Bohemian Rhapsody comes on

Ants have taken over. Grandma carried away. Nephew eaten alive. The weak are taken first. I may be next

I know he can turn it off and on but there’s still something so funny to me about the idea of Hua Cheng, the walking wind chime, getting jump scared by his stealth lord of a husband. Like Xie Lian is just built to sneak up on him. Cause not only does Hua Cheng have a giant blind spot, Xie Lian’s short king status also puts him outta Hua Cheng’s direct eye-line and he’s been a martial artist since he was like 5. He is now 800, and some change. Like, I know he is silent, and I truly wonder how long it takes Hua Cheng to wonder if he should also decorate his Dianxia in bells so he doesn’t scream and embarrass himself because he keeps getting jump-scared by him.

And just remember that behind every beautifully rendered drawing of Kirk and Spock fighting to the death on Vulcan under a bright orange sky, there's a McCoy standing off to the side, experiencing a heart rate believed impossible to achieve in humans up until that point

Promethean task: opposite of a Cassandraean task. You have the right information, and SOMEONE has to share it. But it's all in the delivery and if you're the person to identify the problem you WILL be hated forever.

Oedipal Task: (1) Attempting to avoid an unspeakably awful outcome and in doing so creating the circumstances that will bring it about. (2) Trying to solve an problem and discovering that you are in fact the problem you are trying to solve.

Odyssean task: you’ll complete it but it’ll take 20 times longer than it should and involve multiple side quests and mini-adventures

Medean Task: Doing this is going to destroy you and what you love just as much as the person you're trying to destroy. Everyone is telling you this, and you already know this. But your "fuck that guy and what he thinks he can do to me" instinct is just that strong. Also admittedly you get an extremely badass exit when all's said and done.

this is the sexiest thing i have ever seen

"it's not that deep" START DIGGING!!

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

DIG

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DIG

OOPS TOO DEEP

I think it’s actually iconic that even though Xie Lian lost his entire family and kingdom and friends and everything that felt familiar 800 years ago and he’s been healing and growing from that ever since, he still never even considers forgiving and reconnecting with his technically alive cousin. He still fucking hates that bitch.