to add on to the "nature of language" thing, i didn't fully realize the "i become convinced that the way i interpret words is the way that they're meant" is an autism thing. and this all explains a lot abt why i have such a hard time being understood.
i guess it comes from autistic people operating with a different social understanding, so we interpret meaning differently as well.
reminds me of the study that showed allistic to autistic communication is marked by lack of empathy and assumptions. situations where allistic people don't understand the way autistic people think, and autistic people don't understand the way allistic people think. except it often just becomes 'the autistic person did something wrong' in social situations.
when you have a DD/ID communicating really just becomes you constantly having to overextend yourself for other people. masking. scripting. repeating yourself. straining to find different ways to communicate something, and somehow it makes everything worse. and you're just trying to be understood instead of punished.
a lot of people aren't willing or ready (at first) to understand that people experience the world differently than themselves, even if they're neurodivergent. unfortunately none of us are immune to falling in line with the status quo at times. but that doesn't make it okay.
i wish people would just ask clarifying questions or how i feel because odds are i'm frustrated and need help with something - not trying to make people's lives harder.
