mango's no.1 fan

The documentary includes a brief clip of a 1954 televised newscast about the rise of homosexuality. The host of the program interviewed psychologists, a police officer, and one “known homosexual”. The “known homosexual” is 22 years old. He identifies himself as Curtis White, which is a pseudonym; his name is actually Dale Olson.

So I tracked down the newscast. According to what I can find, Dale Olson may have been the first gay man to appear openly on television and defend his sexual orientation. He explains that there’s nothing wrong with him mentally and he’s never been arrested. When asked whether he’d take a cure if it existed, he says no. When asked whether his family knows he’s gay, he says that they didn’t up until tonight, but he guesses they’re going to find out, and he’ll probably be fired from his job as well. So of course the host is like …why are you doing this interview then? and Dale Olson, cool as cucumber pie, says “I think that this way I can be a little useful to someone besides myself.”

1954. 22 years old. Balls of pure titanium.

Despite the pseudonym, Dale’s boss did indeed recognize him from the TV program, and he was promptly fired the next day. He wrote into ONE magazine six months later to reassure readers that he had gotten a new job at a higher salary.

Curious about what became of him, I looked into his life a little further. It turns out that he ultimately became a very successful publicity agent. He promoted the Rocky movies and Superman. Not only that, but get this: Dale represented Rock Hudson, and he was the person who convinced him to disclose that he had AIDS! He wrote the statement Rock read. And as we know, Rock Hudson’s disclosure had a very significant effect on the national conversation about AIDS in the U.S.

I was thinking about this because I grabbed drinks with a colleague and acquitted myself quite well---asked fun questions, make jokes, talked about books and our educations and mutual colleagues. (Maybe she had a terrible time, but I tried to be my best self so I'm grading for effort...) Only then I went and got dinner with my best friend and college roommate, and suddenly I was not that person. Suddenly I was snarky and a little condescending, I picked fights (cordial fights! but still disagreements) that I didn't need to fight. And heading home afterwards, I realized the shape I'd slipped into: the pricklier, more unsure and therefore more defensive persona that was my armor in college.

It's been over a decade---yet I somehow twisted myself into that shape like no time had gone by at all. Perfect muscle memory of a person I no longer am.

Revertigo, like I said.