i dont really know what kind of girl i am

this reads like it was submitted to a local newspaper in the early 1900s

we could have a disgusting thing going on if you want

you don't want it

you will not feel stuck forever. you’re actually slowly but steadily moving forward in ways you don’t always notice.

i bet the pain will end if i arrange a perfect enough sentence about it

I bet the pain will end if you rearrange my guts enough to where I don’t need to talk about it 🙂

i bet the pain will end if i cum deep enough inside her and cuddle about it 🙃

and im here too! 😃

i dont watch it but its very funny to me that iwtv s1 episode titles are like We Burn Eternally Beneath The Hateful Fury Of A Deity’s Ancient Vengeance and iwtv s3 episode titles are like Cleveland

t’es woke toi 😦🫵 toi t’es un woke left😔🙄 tu supporte les trans pis les pronoms toi 🤨🏳️‍⚧️ veux-tu savoir mes pronoms? 🥱🔥 mes pronoms? 😳😤 que/bec. fran/çais. bar/be/que. go/habs/go.🍁🏒 bleu pis rose 💙🌹 toi c’est quoi tes pronoms? vas-y. dis moj tes pronoms?🧐😪 joe/bi/den? ru/paul? 🤭😒 j’vas prier pour toi 🫤🙏

the trolley problem except the guy tied to one set of tracks is your friend and someone you trust and one of the few people in the world that you genuinely like and he's begging for his life and he's saying that you're murdering him and he's screaming and clawing and running like a wild animal. on the other set of tracks is every living thing on the planet. its a no brainer, obviously. but he will still scream. this happened to my good friend eva stratt

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

World Heritage Post

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me